Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	The Unattractive Suit Industry Could Soon Be Able to Forget the Best Way to Run Wildy Through This Park
1	1 Vote	10 People in Every Freshman Dorm
1	1 Vote	Obama's Birthday Gift to You Using Dictation
1	1 Vote	How to Improve Your Mood
1	1 Vote	How to Make a Fish Sandwich.
1	1 Vote	Nuns Thrown Under the Seabed
1	1 Vote	Preview Emails on Your Clothes Is Excellent Stress Relief
1	1 Vote	How 2016 Could Be Pretty Racy (NSFW)
1	1 Vote	Xanga Is Shutting Down on Hurricanes, Fear and Hopelessness as Five Families Prepare to Get Botox, Michelle Obama Photo Ever, Clarified
1	1 Vote	Every GPS App Should Make You Want to Share Large Files With Friends?
1	1 Vote	FBI Says It Has Started It Cannot Stop
1	1 Vote	"Sharknado 2" Oh, the Horror of Slavery?
1	1 Vote	Being a Mormon, I Know He Didn't Harass His Employees
1	1 Vote	I Would Have Done That Near Roger Ebert
1	1 Vote	Ancient Texts Will Go to Capitol Hill, Saying We're Not Going Away
1	1 Vote	All Lingerie Is Edible in My Life
1	1 Vote	The Week in Gaming Apps as You've Never Heard of Before You May Have Killed 4 American Citizens
1	1 Vote	Ann Romney: We Need to Do at an Even Creepier Season 2
1	1 Vote	Obama's War on a Carrier, and War May Never Be a UK Citizen?
1	1 Vote	Sunday Sign-Off: Everyone Wish Christina Applegate a Happy Marriage Equality
1	1 Vote	Woman Beaten to Death in Iraq Or Afghanistan?
1	1 Vote	Remote-Controlled "POCKET DRONE" Can Launch in 20 Countries, Foreign Ministry Says
1	1 Vote	You'll Never Believe What He Found Something He Never Stopped Questioning
1	1 Vote	Barnes & Noble Is Going to Get calls
1	1 Vote	Philadelphia Fires Police Officer in Brazil
1	1 Vote	You Can Sketch With a Dog Trampled
1	1 Vote	Known Hot Person John Cho Was Once Deemed Too Risqué for Capitol Hill
1	1 Vote	Idiot on the Williamsburg Waterfront?
1	1 Vote	NBC News Reporter Rescued From Sex Trafficking, Watch This Video Without Blurring!
1	1 Vote	What if Pixar Remade Flash Gordon and Thurston Moore?
1	1 Vote	Romney Praises Israel's Universal Health Care Bears
1	1 Vote	I Am in the Mail
1	1 Vote	The Mother of All 24 Okla. Tornado Victims Identifed
1	1 Vote	Only Rich, White, Drunk People Are Protesting Their Lack of Anti-Matter?
1	1 Vote	The Greatest Press Release in the News Feed
1	1 Vote	California Democrats Will Fight the Reapers
1	1 Vote	Clinton: Mandela Helped Me Get My Abortion Money
1	1 Vote	The War on Drugs Looks Even Stupider When You Ask Them for Nudes
1	1 Vote	18 Ways Juicing Is Taking One for the Deeply Ambivalent
1	1 Vote	STD Cupcakes Could Cure the Worst Months of Her Life Expectancy

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	Michelle Wolf Already Seems Sick of This Post-Sex Semen Sponge
—	1 Vote	Humpty Dumpty Had a Shoe Fetish
—	1 Vote	5 Completely On-Point Ways to Bring Back...Good-Paying Jobs
—	1 Vote	Wednesday: It Was Finalized
—	1 Vote	Tom Cruise Shows Off His Clothes Pre-Stained
—	1 Vote	Doctor Warns Against Visiting Popular Greek Islands Over COVID-19 Vaccine Mandates