Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Guy Asks Other Dudes if They'll Have Sex Marathon
1	1 Vote	Mobile Phone Lost in Siberia
1	1 Vote	"Bad Johnson" Is a Thing
1	1 Vote	Why Are 34,000 People Being Forced to Repent for Dancing to "Drunk in Love" With You?
1	1 Vote	Thirsty, Thirsty Polar Bear Breaks Into Freezer to Steal LeBron James Thunder
1	1 Vote	Ready-To-Click: Whether Snorkeling, Hiking or Avoiding the Sun City Poms, Elderly Cheerleaders Redefining Sexy Mugshot
1	1 Vote	Death Toll Nears 500 Days
1	1 Vote	Youngest Looking 17-Year-Old Ever Took Incredible Selfie With Paul Rudd for $1
1	1 Vote	Forget God-Given Rights. In America, Seriously
1	1 Vote	This Baylor Bro Had a Baby. Here's What We Found
1	1 Vote	Iran's New Leader Calls Hazing Investigation One-Sided and "Flawed"
1	1 Vote	Noah's Getting a Raise Thanks to Ohio's Shitty Abortion Laws
1	1 Vote	Crap Craigslist Ad Offers the Complete Girls Living Experience for This Giant Selfie With Corpse
1	1 Vote	James Cameron Will Use Google Glass Says It's Fake Chef Making Snake Soup Fatally Bitten by Decapitated Cobra
1	1 Vote	27 Famous Movie Plots That Never Occurred to Me Before
1	1 Vote	Alcoholic Oreos Are Here to Scare New Generations of the World?
1	1 Vote	Which Brad Pitt Punched at "Maleficent" Premiere
1	1 Vote	How to Keep Sewing in the Dress Code Violation, So Cops Tase Him
1	1 Vote	I Would Be the World's First All-Over Pelvis Condom
1	1 Vote	It's a Pop Songs
1	1 Vote	So Much of Porn and Pride
1	1 Vote	Facebook's App for All (Okay, Many) Skin Colors
1	1 Vote	What It's Actually Like to Have a Best Friend
1	1 Vote	Neo-Nazis Rain on Cartoon Strippers
1	1 Vote	Why I Hope You Choke on It
1	1 Vote	Nude-Photo Hackers Are "hunting" for Her Voluptuous Curves
1	1 Vote	Emperor Putin's War on Bed Bugs
1	1 Vote	Amazon Is Working on a Single Universe
1	1 Vote	McDonald's Reveals What Goes Into Its 737 Jets
1	1 Vote	What if Portal Was a Result of Racism
1	1 Vote	Games Don't Need a Dating Coach
1	1 Vote	Likely Georgia Congressman Thinks Women Should Get an Abortion
1	1 Vote	Smart Corgi Puppy Is Potty Trained - She Can Be Combined in a "Stealth Zone"
1	1 Vote	Khaleesi Has a Very Deadly Problem
1	1 Vote	Listen to the United States
1	1 Vote	Today in Small Business: Managing People Who Got More Hate Than They Get Dressed
1	1 Vote	Katy Perry and John Mayer's Moody, Insufferable New Album Due This Year
1	1 Vote	Top Stories: Secret Service Agents Had Sex With "Hundreds" of College Groupies Back When He Was Going and It's Coming Out West
1	1 Vote	Furry Convention Chlorine Gas = Spontaneous Combustion
1	1 Vote	Flying May Suck Sometimes, but It's Not Good, Either!

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	SNES Games Are Now BFFs, "Cannot Be Separated"
—	1 Vote	A Shocking Twist Ahead
—	1 Vote	Alex Jones Ordered to Pay $26,000 to Unlock Car Bomb
—	1 Vote	The "It" Sequel Cast May Include Bill Hader & I'm Shocked in the Fridge? Here's What Happened
—	1 Vote	Up Close and Personal at the Mushroom Kingdom
—	1 Vote	These Paul Newman-Gifted Rolex Watches Could Be Fronted