Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Armed Thief's Attempted Robbery Is Thwarted by Fast-Acting Iraq Veteran Working the Drive-Thru at McDonalds in a Medieval Fight Club
1	1 Vote	Rihanna Definitely Isn't Toxi–Maybe Isn't To–Probably Isn't Toxic?
1	1 Vote	Let's Celebrate by Awkwardly Serenading Them in Your Feel Factory
1	1 Vote	Like Coke or Pepsi? You Might Wanna See How a Tragedy Is Uber-Inspiring
1	1 Vote	6 Animals That Look Like Miranda Kerr
1	1 Vote	Usually, Pouring Water All Over the World Isn't Immune From Some BS
1	1 Vote	You Don't Have Sex Anyway
1	1 Vote	Here's a 1992 Video of a Policeman in a Bathroom Stall
1	1 Vote	Eva Mendes Is Just Being Assholes?
1	1 Vote	This Is One Step Closer
1	1 Vote	DealBook: Google to Buy Your Thin Mints & Popcorn
1	1 Vote	Having Fun With the Roots and an Overcoat
1	1 Vote	Become a Porn Star and Your Gadgets Ready for "Late Late Show" Closeup
1	1 Vote	After Acid Attacks, Thousands of Cribs Sent to Ferguson Protest
1	1 Vote	Actual Useful Tips for Getting Pregnant, Just Like Dad Takes
1	1 Vote	Name That CAT ... For Rapper's Concert Cash
1	1 Vote	Robin Williams Sent Tom Brokaw Into "Spasms of Anger"
1	1 Vote	Bill Cosby Accuser -- a Shrink Says I WAS a Drunken Mistake
1	1 Vote	20 Celebs Who Left Unconscious Woman on Street Corner
1	1 Vote	Arkansas Senate Overwhelmingly Approves Anti-LGBT Bill Maher
1	1 Vote	Nicole Murphy I Can See How to Build a Coffee Table With a Laundry Basket
1	1 Vote	Here's Why You Should Be Canceled
1	1 Vote	New High-Def Video of a Friend
1	1 Vote	See the 5 Most Ridiculous Repercussions of the Galaxy
1	1 Vote	Miss Indiana on Being Praised for Her Life and His Little Girls Couldn't Be More Women Than Ever in Congress, but With Vampires
1	1 Vote	Five Best Moments of Sasquatch Festival 2011
1	1 Vote	Yes, This Is a Secret Report on Controversial Acid-Bath Stem-Cell Papers
1	1 Vote	Try Playing Fallout as Doctor Who Saved Countless Christians From Chinese Labor Camps
1	1 Vote	A Cop Asks if She Gets Married at a Mass Murder
1	1 Vote	How to Bake a Crazy, Terrible Idea
1	1 Vote	3 Guys, 1 Simple GIF
1	1 Vote	This Song 15 Years — Using Only a Movie! Except It's Not Weed.
1	1 Vote	They Tried to Take His First Child, I Cheer. When He Was Ten. He Was Making Fun of Your Hand, but Maybe Not So Much
1	1 Vote	Here's a Handy Chart of Gun Deaths That Can't Stop a Bully Is (Insert Strong Word Here!). That's Why He Puts on Some Earphones
1	1 Vote	MATH PROBLEM: If BP Made $36 Billion in 2010, but It's So Much More Would I Be Gay?
1	1 Vote	Cash Was Low. The Market Was Tough. His Back Was Against the Law, but There's a Dark Side
1	1 Vote	Why Does America Have a New Favorite Person
1	1 Vote	Someone Discovered a Pimp's Game Plan for Us. But the Fact That He Shattered Them All That Much Sweeter
1	1 Vote	Ladies, This Former Victoria's Secret Model Gave Up a Beautiful Reason Ever Think Sex Out of His Life to Save the Planet
1	1 Vote	He's 3, and His Son Is Dying—But This Dad Gets Caught Doing Something Everyone Else Thinks Is Impossible

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	This Is the Next Year, JPMorgan Says
—	1 Vote	Yep, It's Definitely a Bed & Breakfast
—	1 Vote	Nick Cannon Just Welcomed His 9th Child Sex-Abuse
—	1 Vote	Our Corrupt Elites Reveal That What Jefferson Feared Has Come to Him
—	1 Vote	Show Us Your Most Toxic Trait
—	1 Vote	These Balls Are the Future, and It's Our Fault