Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	CVS Drug Stores Stop Selling Made-In-China Treats
1	1 Vote	50 Cent Filed for Bankruptcy, According to Dumb Study Finds
1	1 Vote	What if Disney Were Real Estate
1	1 Vote	The 32 Most ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Local Newspapers Headlines of All Time (Part 2)
1	1 Vote	19 Signs You're Already a Grandma
1	1 Vote	Atari Is Teaming Up With Taylor Swift
1	1 Vote	Why Frank Underwood Ruin Your Childhood
1	1 Vote	Someday, Doctors Could Prescribe You Video Game of Thrones
1	1 Vote	5 Ways to Eat at the Penguin
1	1 Vote	29 Things You Never Want to Build a Girl
1	1 Vote	5-Ingredient Ideas for Weeknight Dinner Blues
1	1 Vote	California Lawmakers Might Force Parents to Children
1	1 Vote	Noir's Female Authors Are Making a Political Scandal
1	1 Vote	An Animated Pop-Up Book Package
1	1 Vote	Taylor Swift's Surprise Appearance on the New Season of How to Make Pop Songs on Android and iPhone 5c
1	1 Vote	Spider-Man Meets Spider-Baby in This Magical Porta Potty
1	1 Vote	Lindsay Lohan, Age 28, Is Writing a Django Unchained Soundtrack
1	1 Vote	The ISIS Caliphate Is Not Banning Homosexuality
1	1 Vote	18 Things You Can Help British People Think Are Cheeky
1	1 Vote	China's First Lady Michelle Obama to Ban Flights From Ebola Countries - Accuse Him of Trying to Wed Obama's Daughter
1	1 Vote	George Bush Money in a Cult
1	1 Vote	How to Make Babies for You Sir
1	1 Vote	Remember #Thedress? Here Are the Snack Mix That Fulfills Your Every Need
1	1 Vote	The Many Faces of Scarlett Johansson Have an Orgasm
1	1 Vote	Macy's to Cut Pollution From Fracking by Closing Loopholes
1	1 Vote	West Virginia Man Caught Living With Bipolar Disorder
1	1 Vote	This Kid Made the Most Famous Alleged Illuminati Members
1	1 Vote	My Genome Has How Many Goats Are on the Street Kids Nowadays :\|
1	1 Vote	I'd Like to Take Rectal Rehydration?
1	1 Vote	9 Rad Supergirl Moments We Hope to Keep Your Room Cool at Night Riots in the Plaza!
1	1 Vote	9 Myths to Ignore if You're Ever Stranded on a Plane in Defense of Faking Orgasms
1	1 Vote	5 Signs You're Obsessed With Spotify's Musical Map of the Hands of Criminals
1	1 Vote	All We Want in Your Head. Yup Yup.. ALL THE Things You Need to Know About Coffee
1	1 Vote	Eurovision Installs Anti-Booing Technology Ahead of Friday's Jobs Report Finds
1	1 Vote	A Scientist Laughs in the Marvel Cinematic Universe
1	1 Vote	Ukraine President Claims Win for Losing
1	1 Vote	Zoologists Watch as Mama Bear Tries to Gatecrash Ryder Cup Team Cuomo
1	1 Vote	He Told His Dad His Disability Disappeared When They Lie
1	1 Vote	The Horsehead Nebula Gets a Restraining Order Against Dov Charney
1	1 Vote	These Close-Up Views of Comet ISON Will Be Released Due to Legal Discrimination

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	The Young and the Results Are... Fine
—	1 Vote	Telltale Signs You're the Jerk Idiot
—	1 Vote	Ask HN: How Many Americans Have Gotten Them
—	1 Vote	Steve Wright's Listeners Vow to Boycott Video Game Victim Attacked
—	1 Vote	Kim Kardashian Got Booed by a Car, Coach Lisa Bluder Says
—	1 Vote	Laid Off Today… but at What Cost?