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Headline Smasher

Real news remixed into fake news.
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Inventory: 15 Ways to Make Popcorn a Lot Gayer

narkysawtooth

1. Popcorn bucket trick
2. Rainbow popcorn
3. Glitter popcorn

And much, much more!

I'm Donating Sperm to My Hairline

narkysawtooth

Please don't.

Bond With Your Mortal Enemy

narkysawtooth

Multiple ways to read this.

White Women Are More Popular Than Head Lice

narkysawtooth

I would think so, yes.

A New York City to Shut the Fuck Up Forever

narkysawtooth

Sweet, another "Shut The Fuck Up Forever" smash.

It's Time to Shut the Fuck Up Forever

narkysawtooth

It really is.

Nintendo Steps Into Porn Biz

aguywhosmashesthingys

Then they advertised with Playboy for Bayonetta 2.

J.K. Rowling Says Harry Potter Sequel!

aguywhosmashesthingys

Old news

Scandal: Politician Goes to Work

aguywhosmashesthingys

SO SHOCKING!

I Grew Up in an Elevator

aguywhosmashesthingys

Well done.

Hey, You GUUUUUUYS My Wife Is a GameStop Pre-Order Bonus Coming to PC and Consoles

aguywhosmashesthingys

Weirdest Electric Company opening ever!

Oh God, This Fucking Pencil

aguywhosmashesthingys

I love how 2 best headlines revolve around pencils.

Oh No, He's Done It Again – Firearms Instructor Accidentally Shoots Girlfriend While Aiming at Ex-Girlfriend

aguywhosmashesthingys

*crazy cartoon music plays*

Her Daughter Merges

narkysawtooth

And now, what she did to survive...
Is nothing...
Compared to what she'll do...
For revenge...

French Scientist Claims Bras Are Upon Us

narkysawtooth

Quickly! Take off your bra! For SCIENCE!

The 33 Most Jizz-Worthy Moments in Animal Crossing

jxking

Good lord

Obama Calls for Boycotts and Domain Transfers

aguywhosmashesthingys

First ever

Chinese Authorities Make Arrests in Attempt to Make Homemade Bagels

aguywhosmashesthingys

Ok

NASA Is Testing New Menu Items – and You Are Looking Delicious

aguywhosmashesthingys

;)

This Is Why You Need to Caption This Photo of a Line

aguywhosmashesthingys

_____________
CAPTION IT

How Five Nights at Freddy's Is a Sin!

aguywhosmashesthingys

Says everyone ever.

Obama Takes a Shit

aguywhosmashesthingys

xD

HAHA: No One Invited Uncle Rico

aguywhosmashesthingys

Poor uncle Rico

The Orb Return to "The View"

aguywhosmashesthingys

We do need more orbs.

All the Secrets of Making Fun of Diet Ads

aguywhosmashesthingys

Let's find out, shall we?

They Asked Him His Job. Big Mistake

aguywhosmashesthingys

He is a spy, and this info is classified

7 Popular Old-Timey "Hobbies" That Will Blow Your Mind Blown

aguywhosmashesthingys

They will blown your mind blown, for sure

Bob Newhart Finally Wins an Emmy After Decades of Trying to Stowaway on a Plane, and He Wants to Be Broadcast in Times Square Enix

aguywhosmashesthingys

xD

23 Pumpkins Who Were Total Badasses

aguywhosmashesthingys

They fought.

"Asswipe," Replied Yahoo's Server. That's When I Knew Exactly How She Felt

aguywhosmashesthingys

xD

16 Badass Fictional Girls Who Found Out and Proud Gay Folks, Why Should We All Become Yogurt Zombies

aguywhosmashesthingys

We should all become yogurt zombies

Let's Build a House for $5

aguywhosmashesthingys

Ok.

"Love Letters" Cast Members Acting Out a Hurricane

aguywhosmashesthingys

Sounds exciting

Handy New App Teaches Guys How to Embarrass Their Kids

rlamothe199

Hahahaha!

Tony Hawk Game, Says Tony Hawk Game, Says Tony Hawk

dankey-kang

GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK
GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK
GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK
GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK GAME, SAYS TONY HAWK

Twitter CEO Admits "We Suck at Dealing With Abuse and Trolls"

narkysawtooth

They're both the same headline!

I'd Fuck a Dragon

sarkas

where are the sources tho

The World's Oldest Woman Dies at Age 9

sarkas

this has always been my favorite one tho

What Color Is Lavender

sarkas

okay this is the best one

25 Struggles Every Sarcastic Person Has Experienced

seamoose

Voted because this is totally me