Headline Smasher

'MURICA!

And the award for the most Alex Jones-y, tinfoil hatty thing I've read today goes to...

In Australia, everything wants to kill you. EVERYTHING.

The jokes basically write themselves.

Tasty word salad

I guess when you're a Chinese billionaire you can call yourself whatever you want.

Al Gore's erotic fan-fic?

The end is near.

Sequel: https://headlinesmasher.com/255134

Sequel to this: https://headlinesmasher.com/24526

Opinion: Apples are crap and you're a liar.

it's a 150 page essay of a man describing how much he loves apples

This is genuinely something a cat would do.

Capitalism, amirite?

*facepalm*

KID ROCK & TED NUGENT! Coming soon to an arena near you!

There's a shit-storm a-brewin'.

What did I just read?

Serious advertising power

That's weird...

Unlikely.

Shouldn't that be great white power?

Jim Breuer?

When chili night goes horribly, horribly wrong.

Cheese tea was interesting, but this is just a step too far.

That's weirdly specific.

"Shit"

lol if its even real

step 1:don't approach the wizards
step 2:don't
step 3:just don't
step 4:you can't stop them
step 5:just leave them alone
step 6:they'll work it out on their own
step 7:go home
step 8:see they're already done
step 9:this article was useless

This headline brought to you by Skynet

No, they’re over 2,000.

Aren't we all?

But they do add +1 to Disease Resistance

Those are the same headline!

Plain Old Guy 2020.

Go on...

This can’t be good...

Was it Hannity? I bet it was Hannity.

Where can I buy it?

At last.