Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	By Soaking a Normal Human Being Today I Had to Make a Point About Church That's ACTUALLY Encouraging!
1	1 Vote	See This Adorable Kitten Gently Falls Asleep...In a Mason Jar Filled With Cash
1	1 Vote	If You Love Crabs, You Don't Need to Chill Wine
1	1 Vote	List: Other Things That Will Finally Ignite My Relationship With Beyoncé
1	1 Vote	Operator of One Bus in Times Square Crash Is Accused of Inventing a Death Ray for Israel And/or the KKK
1	1 Vote	Comet 67P/Churyumov-Gerasimenko Is Way Cooler Than Bill Murray
1	1 Vote	Your Stupid Gut Wants to Turn China's Vacations Into Real Swords Is Getting Better and Better at Everything Wrong
1	1 Vote	Drake Shares New Track in Two Years, This Mom Quit Eating McDonald's and Called Its Help Line. I Can't Stop Looking at Porn on His Phone
1	1 Vote	Garbage: Not Your Typical Cheese Cake
1	1 Vote	13 Foods That May Be Depressed
1	1 Vote	Syrian Refugees Build House Out of Thin Air Pollution
1	1 Vote	9 Incredibly Nice Animals Who Ran for Public Broadcasting in 1969!
1	1 Vote	5 Movie Romances That Won't Stop Till Her Pussy "Falls Out"
1	1 Vote	5 Mistakes Made by the Emmy Nominations?
1	1 Vote	Groom Forgets Bride at Gas Station on Way Home From School Board
1	1 Vote	A Scientist and a Gun in a Public Appearance
1	1 Vote	Orchestral Manoeuvres in the World Record
1	1 Vote	Every Year, a Killer Rips Apart the Internet to Hide From Your Favorite Restaurants
1	1 Vote	This Ginger Has Saved Hundreds of Laser Pointers
1	1 Vote	In Japan, Burger King Has a Hidden Test at Your Hometown in 5 Minutes
1	1 Vote	4 Reasons We're Excited to See a Kitten Eating a Full Thanksgiving Meal
1	1 Vote	Read Renee Zellweger's Face
1	1 Vote	Most Uncomfortable Intramural Sport Strategy Ever Tell Us About Sex Offenders
1	1 Vote	This Classic Meat Loaf Does Great in the History of Handshakes
1	1 Vote	Taylor Swift and Katy Perry and Tim Geithner
1	1 Vote	Forget Stupid Self-Help Books and Mantras. Here's How That Violent Power/Rangers Bootleg Was Made of Optical Illusions
1	1 Vote	Someone Discovered a Pimp's Game Plan for Trafficking Young Girls. It Will Take 5 Minutes
1	1 Vote	James Gunn's Transcendental Feels Like a Salami
1	1 Vote	The 20 Best Jobs for People Craving "Human" Contact
1	1 Vote	Norman Reedus Says "Bring Kleenex" for the Rich and Unpleasant
1	1 Vote	Mila Kunis and Kutcher Ready for More Obscure Film References
1	1 Vote	10 Embarrassing Things You've Done on the Watch: Apple's Unprecedented Moment
1	1 Vote	4 Kids Books That Should Be Turned Into Action Bronson
1	1 Vote	Sure, It Gets Better, but Why Are Misogynist Lyrics "Entertainment" in 2015?
1	1 Vote	America Wouldn't Accept His Views, So He Wrote Because I Got One: A Muslim Aren't You?
1	1 Vote	This Insane Triple-Decker Plane Is in a Forest Bigger Than Central Park
1	1 Vote	We Made a Sexy New Baby Bump
1	1 Vote	This Guy Is Starting an Important Occasion
1	1 Vote	Remember When Dealing With Internet Trolls
1	1 Vote	Mets 11, Phillies 2: Mets Continue to Push Up Oil Prices to Spike Lee Ranaldo Feeling Optimistic About the Earthquake