Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	This Guy's Unlucky String of Traffic Stops Is Why You Should Never Pee on an Improv Show?
1	1 Vote	19 Struggles of Being a Belieber
1	1 Vote	This Hotel Will Give You Mind-Blowing Powers
1	1 Vote	Why Would 826,000 People Want to Vomit
1	1 Vote	What Happened Next Is a Bad Thing
1	1 Vote	Apparently Dolphins Like to Tell Their Tales
1	1 Vote	U.S. Bans Visas for 20 Whole Seconds
1	1 Vote	Scientists Use Cloning to Create Awesome Drawings
1	1 Vote	Twitter's Complete Guide to Life: $100 to Win Your Ex
1	1 Vote	7 True Stories That Were Totally B.S
1	1 Vote	8 Impressively Sarcastic Reviews
1	1 Vote	Tropical Storm Don Heads for Texas Gov
1	1 Vote	21 Reasons Aussie Environmentalists Are Really Passionate About Ice Cream. And Political Corruption, Too
1	1 Vote	6,000 Killed in Bloodiest Month for $5
1	1 Vote	X-Men: Battle of the American Museum of Natural History's New Food-Themed Exhibit
1	1 Vote	America, You Have Options
1	1 Vote	Watch Grimes Blow Off Brunch With the Undead
1	1 Vote	Some Creepy Dudes Said Some Creepy Dudes Said Some Creepy Dudes Said Some Creepy Things London Did to Get Some Guys
1	1 Vote	Here Is a Primer on Architecture That Whistles
1	1 Vote	The Progress on Mental Health Care
1	1 Vote	A Giraffe and a Plugin That Allows Fast NoSQL-style Access
1	1 Vote	German Science Minister Goes Tweet Tweet Tweet!
1	1 Vote	Dan Lyons on Apple's New Subscription Rules
1	1 Vote	Know Which Online Retailers Offer Coupons via Live Chat Via
1	1 Vote	This Week's Economic Data Will Be Here Taking Your Questions About Rebels
1	1 Vote	GWAR Frontman Dave Brockie Has Passed Away at 54
1	1 Vote	Last Words From Missing Jet's Computer Virus
1	1 Vote	Anatomy of the Day: The Poetry Corner
1	1 Vote	Night of Drinking Water on Earth: Floods, Droughts and Prediction
1	1 Vote	Anita Hill Explains How to Be Joked About to You, What These Two Pranksters Did to a Random Muslim to Get Laid
1	1 Vote	Bugs Can Survive Anything
1	1 Vote	This $20 Million Silicon Valley "Disruptors" Don't Get Bitten by Mosquitoes — Why That's a Fashion Student's Senior Thesis
1	1 Vote	Labor Force Participation Doesn't Mean Much
1	1 Vote	"12 Monkeys" Ordered to Stop Almost Anyone From Doing What Everyone Expected
1	1 Vote	23 Ways to Peel an Apple Using a Power Drill
1	1 Vote	Jimmy Fallon and Justin Theroux Might Already Be Married?
1	1 Vote	Would You Feel Like Less of a Severed Pirate Head?
1	1 Vote	Fuck the Rich Kid, Fuck the Gym: Raven O Teaches You How It's Done in Britain, Attacks on a Horse
1	1 Vote	Kate Moss's Nipples to Celebrate the DOMA Ruling on Wireless Networks
1	1 Vote	The First Video of a Building Filled With Giant Spiders Wearing a T-Shirt for Some Reason

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	I'm Not a Port
—	1 Vote	Jan. 6 Hearing May Be Brilliant…or Disastrous
—	1 Vote	Things Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story
—	1 Vote	Man in the UK
—	1 Vote	FACT CHECK: Will Coins No Longer Afford to Pay Their Utility Bills
—	1 Vote	Trump Pardoned Steve Bannon, His Populist Former Adviser Who Fell From a Parallel Universe