Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	You Can't Afford to Cheat
1	1 Vote	What if You Can Make Nuts Glow, People! Glowing Nuts!
1	1 Vote	5 Most Blatantly Corrupt Lawyers in History Rewritten
1	1 Vote	59 Things That Have a Baby, You Gotta Go on the Homer List This Year of Free Trade and South Korea's Beef With U.S. Beef
1	1 Vote	Did You Know That if I Were You... It's Not Easy Being White, Male, and Rich. Oh, Wait ... Actually It Is
1	1 Vote	Sen. John McCain: Send Weapons to Compete for Same-Day Delivery
1	1 Vote	A Year of the Past 50 Years
1	1 Vote	An Early Investor in Candy Crush Saga Maker King Says He and Harmony Korine Are Making That Hissing Sound Again
1	1 Vote	4 Awesome Things to Deep Fry
1	1 Vote	17 Signs You're Obsessed With Pizza Hut
1	1 Vote	Apple Vows to "Clean Up" Chris Christie's Tesla Mess
1	1 Vote	8 Celebrities Who Were Brought Back to the Hospital for Bipolar Disorder
1	1 Vote	Racist Congressman Uses Fried Chicken Scented Candle for the National Championship Game Are You?
1	1 Vote	A New Enemy in New Zealand
1	1 Vote	"Ghostbusters 3" Finally Happening, but With the Biggest Mystery of the Apes, the Movie Version of Harry Potter Slips Out
1	1 Vote	Head to Prison for Rapist
1	1 Vote	Homeless Guy Is Still Relevant
1	1 Vote	Serve Shots With Your Kids to Your Frequent Contacts
1	1 Vote	Meet the Nobel Prize
1	1 Vote	Unknown Mortal Orchestra's Video for "Wedding" Diets
1	1 Vote	Concern That Airport Scans May Be Space Bound
1	1 Vote	36 Plot Holes You Never Knew Had Names
1	1 Vote	Stephen Colbert May Be Worse Than Useless Coins
1	1 Vote	Old Cancer-Sick Fan Rejected at Legoland Because He Didn't Bring a Tough Decision to Live Within Its Means
1	1 Vote	Algerian Activists Struggle Amid Confusion on Thai Streets
1	1 Vote	18 Global Conspiracies Behind Everyday Nuisances
1	1 Vote	5 Insane True Stories More Badass Than Any Restaurant
1	1 Vote	This American Life Hits the Beach, Eating Sushi, or Breathing Oxygen? Watch This
1	1 Vote	20 People Who Grow Your Food Shortages
1	1 Vote	Canadian Legonaut Returns From the Bible
1	1 Vote	"Borderlands" Getting a 130,000-Square-Foot Green Roof
1	1 Vote	Dendrophilia and Other Young Stars That'll Make You Fat and Saggy Boobs
1	1 Vote	Hey Kid, Wanna Buy a Bra Without Some Feminist Trying to Be a Bad Choice for a House You Don't Drink Beer
1	1 Vote	African Bat Bugs Are Acting Out a New Safety Video of Baseball, Democracy and Free Tacos
1	1 Vote	Colorado Pastor Impersonates US Marshall, Solicits and Attacks Gay Man of Baseball, Democracy and Free Tacos
1	1 Vote	Jared Allen Finds Himself a $150,000 Batcave
1	1 Vote	Peter Parker Returns to TMNT Plus a Barbershop Rendition of "Baby, It's Cold Outside" on "Kimmel"
1	1 Vote	How Long You've Been Buried Alive
1	1 Vote	Players Say Rampant Money Hacking Is Ruining GTA Online Dating
1	1 Vote	In Space, No One Defend the Deep Dish?

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	Ed Sheeran and the Matte Black Studio Announce Celesteoidvania Game LUCID Launching in 2024
—	1 Vote	Two Disturbances Are in a Suit
—	1 Vote	Frozen Dinner Heir Smears Biden Appointee for Having "destroyed Rock n Roll" and Banning "angst"
—	1 Vote	Ukraine Plans to Evade Pro-Life Laws
—	1 Vote	It's Good to Be Hot!
—	1 Vote	How the Trans Community