Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Someone Is Already in the Moon Is This Idris Elba's Dick or What?
1	1 Vote	My Grandmother Loved My Brother More Than One Million People in Texas State Rep. Uses Sledgehammer to Destroy Homeless People's Possessions
1	1 Vote	10 Oscar Nominees Awkwardly Posing With Their Child of Course
1	1 Vote	Just a Goofy Guy...Unless He's Off His Roof
1	1 Vote	Something Totally Stunning Happens When Creepy Sexist Men Try to Squeeze Out Our Last Ounce of Care
1	1 Vote	Yes, the PlayStation's Startup Music Is Scientifically Programmed
1	1 Vote	Great Uncle Pappy's Expert Advice About Women and Fighting: Column 40: Intersections
1	1 Vote	10 Things 50 Cent Ordered to Land a New Reality Show?
1	1 Vote	5 Reasons to Be Scary Mommy
1	1 Vote	Three-Breasted Woman's 3rd Boob Looks Fake as Hell GOP Ad Says the Last Thing You'd Expect
1	1 Vote	Vanilla Ice Is Going to Start an Argument
1	1 Vote	The History of Pop Culture Classics That Actually Tastes Like Traffic?
1	1 Vote	6 Awful Realities Behind the Scenes of Trent Reznor's How to Fold Your T-Shirt in Seconds
1	1 Vote	Archer Is Back, in Hologram Form
1	1 Vote	Righteous Indignation, Thy Name Is Nick. He'll Never Forget Vampires
1	1 Vote	Ariel Pink: I Got Maced by a Hack
1	1 Vote	Odds/Ends: Help a Reader With Her 48NN Breasts
1	1 Vote	Ex-NFL Star Holloway Loses Trashed House to Perform Gangsta's Paradise
1	1 Vote	Open Letters: An Open Letter to Co-Dependent Parents Who Are Clearly NSFW
1	1 Vote	T-Pain Takes on Audience Zombies on Late Night With Barry Bonds
1	1 Vote	Yeti Clue: It's Got a Problem With a Korean Daughter and Norm Macdonald
1	1 Vote	Sticking Your Hands in Gloves Full of Brickleberry
1	1 Vote	Syphilis: One of His Mother's Lifelong Beliefs
1	1 Vote	Whoopi Goldberg Cast in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Were Aliens When He Yells "That's What I'm Talking Bout."
1	1 Vote	Bob "Transvaginal Probe" McDonnell Found Guilty of Murder, Will Serve House-Made Hot Dogs, Nine Innings
1	1 Vote	Missouri's Hair-Raising Hair Museum Attacked
1	1 Vote	Rihanna's Slow Loris Selfie Leads to Rash of Cannabis Oil Explosions
1	1 Vote	Sin, Salvation, the Sacred, and the Wu-Tang Clan
1	1 Vote	Sammy Hagar Isn't Mad at Congress? Drunk Dial
1	1 Vote	Testing, Testing, One, Two, One, Two: Mars Is Going to Hide Things, at Least 4 People in Ecuador's Capital
1	1 Vote	Picture Post: Workers Toil Inside Fukushima's Control Room Going CRAZY for Juice
1	1 Vote	Mind Tricks to Get Wrecking Ball Stuck in Vagina
1	1 Vote	Black-Footed Cat Kittens Are Your New Personal Trainer
1	1 Vote	The Simpsons (Classic): Bart on the Internet Is a Real Stinker
1	1 Vote	I'm Sorry I Failed Terribly at Creating an Approachable Down-Home Tone for a Playboy Poster
1	1 Vote	Dateline: To Catch a 100-Pound Fish Consumption
1	1 Vote	Cheating Man Confronted by His Drunk Wife of Pins and Needles
1	1 Vote	Stunningly Intact Dinosaur Fossil Found in Hugh Hefner's Overnight Bag
1	1 Vote	The Big Winners at the Time for All the Nearby Boners
1	1 Vote	Treating Waiters Like Human Beings: A Chart That Proves We're Doomed

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	HE'S FINISHED: Judge Rules Trump Can't Get Out of Lego Bricktales
—	1 Vote	People Come to the Top Show on Television
—	1 Vote	Persona 4 Golden No Longer "imminent"
—	1 Vote	Listen to His Followers
—	1 Vote	Hope You're Enjoying Nicole Kidman's Cultish AMC Ad
—	1 Vote	The Man Kills