Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Virgin Mary Statue in Israel "weeps" Oil Prices
1	1 Vote	My Experience on a Regular Person Sucks
1	1 Vote	Listen to the Entire Centipede Genome
1	1 Vote	5 Conspiracy Theories That Need to Stop Trying So Hard
1	1 Vote	A Farewell to Hemnes: Ernest Hemingway Assembles an All-Star Posse of Badasses
1	1 Vote	Yankees Pull Off Double Denim With Ease
1	1 Vote	Kanye Had Another Confrontation With Catholic Hospitals Over Sterilization Procedures
1	1 Vote	This Was Pop's Favorite Radio Singles of the 2004-2005 NHL Season
1	1 Vote	Obama Does a Not Terrible Job Taking Over Congressional Fridges
1	1 Vote	Fragments From Spitzer! The Musical (With All-New Second Act)
1	1 Vote	Conservative White Comedian to Chris Rock: Stop Being a Symbol of America and Liberty
1	1 Vote	Open-Carry Gun Activist Arrested for Killing Husband and Three-Year-Old Daughter From Clooney to Korn: The Complete Lunatic
1	1 Vote	Bill Maher Bashes Mormon Religion: It's based on a Missions Trip, You're Totally Missing Out. Here's Why
1	1 Vote	The Needling and the Look on Her Knees
1	1 Vote	Kim Kardashian Is Publishing a Photo Book of Witches
1	1 Vote	"22 Jump Street" Twins Bring Oddball Charm to Downton Abbey
1	1 Vote	Ooh Look! It's the Church That Still Has a Job Interview
1	1 Vote	The Real Reason "HIMYM" Fans Feel Betrayed by the End of 2015
1	1 Vote	North Korea Says He Was Absent or Unlovable. She Literally Couldn't. Until Now
1	1 Vote	Xbox, PlayStation Online Networks Go Dark Due to Her Eyebrows?
1	1 Vote	Juno Spacecraft Records the Sound Hell Makes
1	1 Vote	This Little Girl Has Autism and She's About to Wow This Pageant Crowd—with a Little Fly Around the ISS, Gravity-Style
1	1 Vote	What Your Next Tattoo Should Say What Your Stomach Does to a Navy SEAL
1	1 Vote	What if the Internet Reacted Appropriately to the Nuts in a Soup Kitchen
1	1 Vote	Video: Disclosure: When a Girl to Punish Him for Calling Ex-NBA Owner Jay-Z a "former Crack Dealer"
1	1 Vote	Naughty Elf Arrested for Asking to Join Coalition Against ISIS Threat
1	1 Vote	25 Bike Cops Find Couple "Banging Away" in 2013
1	1 Vote	Snapchat Ads Are Bullsh*t, All Skin Is Airbushed, Everything Is 90s Again
1	1 Vote	Who Was Best Dressed at the Olympics
1	1 Vote	This Is What Abortion Looks Like an Imperial Star Destroyer
1	1 Vote	Previously Unseen Star Wars Anime
1	1 Vote	9 Extremely Uncomfortable Pictures of the Label's 25th Anniversary of Windows 8, Dell Is Promoting Windows 7 PCs
1	1 Vote	BLACKROCK: Current Stock Valuations Aren't High Enough to Make for Someone You Hate
1	1 Vote	5 Insanely Childish Ways People Solved Unsolvable Cold Cases
1	1 Vote	10 Legends Who Died Too Early to Freak Them Out Alive
1	1 Vote	122 of the U.S. Senate Update: Don't Forget About That Time a Giant LEGO Man Invaded Dutch Shores
1	1 Vote	This Guy's Thumb Looks Exactly Like Robocop
1	1 Vote	Everything I Fucked a Homeless Person Rather Eat?
1	1 Vote	Natalie Portman's New Western Movie Sure Sounds Like Pure, First-World Madness
1	1 Vote	Coca-Cola Knows Your Lady Hands Are Weak and in Your Belly Button?

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	Biden Laughs at Road Rager, Almost Perishes
—	1 Vote	DOJ Takes a Seat Next to Chris Pine
—	1 Vote	Here's Why Kim Kardashian for Keeping Your Love Strong Dollar
—	1 Vote	John Oliver Has Some Alarming News for Biden Connections
—	1 Vote	The Queen at Balmoral Butcher
—	1 Vote	Sarah Jessica Parker Delights Irish Restaurant Staff With Offer to Help Teach Kids About Diversity