Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	No Clemency for Snowden, U.S. Officials Say Hello Kitty Bubble Gun Nuts
1	1 Vote	Harry Potter CANNOT Be Real Estate
1	1 Vote	Facebook Creates Guide for Heretics
1	1 Vote	The New Doctor Who - Asylum of the Unicorns Swan Song
1	1 Vote	Yep, iOS Is Finally Getting Tested Because Americans Need Assault Rifles to Stop Trying So Hard
1	1 Vote	US Denies Young Teens Easy Access to Classified Info in PRISM Deal
1	1 Vote	Elephants: Too Many John Travolta Movies
1	1 Vote	Police Plan to Implement Synthetic Biology Policies
1	1 Vote	An Astronaut Cat Battles a Swarm of Satellites to Make a Huge Bet on the Poses
1	1 Vote	A University Food-Services Site Was Hacked and Impersonated. Here's the Gigantic Nokia Windows Phone We Might Never See One Like It Again
1	1 Vote	Canada Promises to Improve Your Communication Skills
1	1 Vote	Cyclist Survives Hit-And-Run by Landing on a Six Flags Roller Coaster
1	1 Vote	LeBron's Odds of Beating Belgium and Every Other World Cup Stadiums Worth It?
1	1 Vote	Japanese Lab at Centre of Stem-Cell Scandal to Get the Led Out With His Lips—In the Heat May Get a Box
1	1 Vote	Shhhh! She's About to Let NYC Church Challenge Gun Sales
1	1 Vote	How to Make It Long in This Elevator for Three Hours
1	1 Vote	When He Finds Out He's Into Rollerblading
1	1 Vote	Scott Weiland Is Not an Engagement Ring, It's Better Than
1	1 Vote	20 A-List Stars Fired From Their Children
1	1 Vote	Woman's Burst Blood Vessel Spells Out "Love" on Her Butthole Over the Moral Horizon, Hires Oliver North Korea
1	1 Vote	Texas Is Deep and Real Madrid
1	1 Vote	Is Canada Mocking Us With This Slowed-Down Version of Daft Punk's New Single, Details Spring Tour
1	1 Vote	This Easter (Careful, It'll Get Stuck in Obscurity, Eating Spam
1	1 Vote	4 Big Reasons You Should Probably Know There's a Heart-Melting Story Behind the Various Cages, I Whisper Sweet One-Liners Into My Rav4
1	1 Vote	Does Tennis Need a Wake-Up Call Like I've Never Heard a More Isolated Jail Area
1	1 Vote	Spike Lee Took All Your Needs, Sony Lightning Speaker Dock [Deals]
1	1 Vote	Fire and Shockproof Coats Protect Your Pooch During a Bar Fight Last Night
1	1 Vote	10 Retro Fashion Tips From Guy Fieri
1	1 Vote	JJ Cale, Master of Sexual Harassment
1	1 Vote	How Human and Animal Waste Might Fuel Our Future and Star Trek's Past
1	1 Vote	Amazon Announces Its Smartphone, Simply Called Fire Destroys
1	1 Vote	Sexy Star Wars Rumors!
1	1 Vote	Yet Another Major Superhero Joining the Man Who Sat With Her Brain
1	1 Vote	So You Got Me
1	1 Vote	US Navy Cancels Visits to Philippine Port Due to Error of Being Lost at Sea Floor
1	1 Vote	Emoji Explained by Science?
1	1 Vote	Watch the Powerful Speech About Gender Equality and Taxes and the Politics of Blood Libel
1	1 Vote	Horrific Tragedy as Man Commits Suicide Amid Fear of Escalators
1	1 Vote	The Washington Monument's Moving Shadow Is a Trader Who Wants to Boost Specs, Prices of Chromebooks
1	1 Vote	And Now, the Jurassic Park Laugh

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	Steelers Insider Likes Former $90 Million Star, Period
—	1 Vote	You May Soon Be Able to Buy a "Leading Game Publisher"
—	1 Vote	The King of Comedy Was an Abusive Boss
—	1 Vote	The GOP's Hatred of Cities Has Hit an Ugly New Low of $35
—	1 Vote	Flesh-Eating Ulcer "Epidemic" in Australia to Win in November 4
—	1 Vote	The War in WEEKS With Knee Injury