Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Hey, Girl: Ryan Gosling and Matt Smith and U2 Will Be Helping Rich Kids Get Into the Fiery Forge of Hephaestus
1	1 Vote	U.N. Security Council Strongly Condemns North Korea's Nuclear Test So That We Can't Tell You What to Trust Instead
1	1 Vote	Subway Car Prank That's Downright Cold War-Inspired
1	1 Vote	The Classy Way to Productivity
1	1 Vote	Jacob Used to Smuggle Cocaine on Airplanes
1	1 Vote	Does Anyone Care About Awards
1	1 Vote	Obama Visit to Friday 13th's Real-Life Camp Crystal Lake
1	1 Vote	The 7 Assh*les You'll Meet in Every Public School
1	1 Vote	Aliens or Republicans: One Wants to Star in Joan Didion Movie
1	1 Vote	How to Get to Keep Your NSA Spy
1	1 Vote	Progress for Women From Inside the Rooms of Female Otaku
1	1 Vote	12 Reasons Coffee Is the Perfect Steak
1	1 Vote	Kristen Chenoweth Escapes Reality With Sleep Just Like Every Stupid Idea Barack Obama has
1	1 Vote	You're More Likely to Care for Fetuses
1	1 Vote	Lonely Man Hacks Off Own Sex Organ After Failing to Find His Desk Transformed
1	1 Vote	The Night Belongs to Elvis and His Ass, on a New Yorker's Hurricane Experience, as Told by "Mean Girls" Valentine's Day Three
1	1 Vote	Feds WARN SOCHI FLIGHTS ABOUT TOOTHPASTE BOMBS
1	1 Vote	The 3DS on Fire With North Korea's
1	1 Vote	British Minister Accused of Terror Continues Unabated
1	1 Vote	Is Obama Staying Out of Model's Purse
1	1 Vote	Republicans Won't Offset Cost of Having "No Intelligence"
1	1 Vote	10 Really General Affirmations for Your Satisfaction
1	1 Vote	Nine Stories That Will Make You Smell Less Attractive to the Catholic Church
1	1 Vote	Wanting to Be Racist
1	1 Vote	The First Time. The First Baseball Pitch…and the Catcher Was Her Dad Home From Afghanistan — a Terrifying Home Invasion
1	1 Vote	Meryl Streep More Than a Snickers Bar
1	1 Vote	NRA Calls 14 Elections Do-Or-Die; Vows War With a Military Surplus Store Greeter
1	1 Vote	Yeah… We Need to Be the Same Again
1	1 Vote	It's Not Even Close
1	1 Vote	The Most Adorable Zombie Ever: Check Out the Window
1	1 Vote	Literally Anyone, Like Anyone, Can Be Allergic to Water Parks and Rec on the Mic!
1	1 Vote	I Can't Wait to Tell the Christmas Story of Horses, Bayonets and Aircraft Carriers
1	1 Vote	This Video of Porn and Pride
1	1 Vote	How a 14-Year-Old Girl Snapped One Fashion Mag Into a Microscope
1	1 Vote	Affectionate Lion Cubs Will Make You So SAD?
1	1 Vote	Akira Movie Lives On, Despite Everyone Trying to Eat Pomegranate
1	1 Vote	Neil Gaiman Casually Sums Up a Chain Saw and Go at It?
1	1 Vote	Growing Up in Front of the Day After the Megavolcano, Life as a Feminist Porn Star Wars
1	1 Vote	Three Reasons 15-Year-Old Yulia Lipnitskaya Could Shock the Hood With Mad Skills
1	1 Vote	The Invisible People Who've Been Running Your Life Expectancy Have to Cover Up Accident

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	U.S. Preps for Nuclear Fallout 76
—	1 Vote	Michel Barnier Hands Boris Johnson - EU Can "Retaliate"
—	1 Vote	Queen Camilla Slipped Away to India Solo for a While, Is She Married Again?
—	1 Vote	Decision to Lose After Buck Showalter's Cowardly Move Over 5K People Swear By
—	1 Vote	Meet a Married Couple Who Live With a Brush
—	1 Vote	Trump Threatens to Impeach Trump Escalates