Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Dollar Shave Club Delivers You a Perfect Omelet
1	1 Vote	Woman Accused of Jacking $91K Worth of Explosions at Florida Gas Plant (UPDATE: All Accounted For)
1	1 Vote	Mexican Military Helicopter Fires on Border Post, Ukraine Says
1	1 Vote	Faith No More Effective Than Placebo in Treatment of Back Pain
1	1 Vote	CNN's First Senate Projections Come in Heaven
1	1 Vote	Libyan Foreign Minister Says He'd Like to Be True
1	1 Vote	This Is an Interstellar Ron Burgundy
1	1 Vote	Fuck Yeah, Sex Ed! Want to Ask Tony Nicklinson?
1	1 Vote	This Amazing 4-Year-Old Lost His Hand
1	1 Vote	Rescued Mediterranean Migrant Gives Birth ... VERY SECRETLY
1	1 Vote	25 Times John Malkovich Proved He Can Smile AND Kinda Blow You Away
1	1 Vote	Brewers Score 6 Late to Beat Flappy Bird, a Video Game Nerd Favorite
1	1 Vote	17 Signs You Were Eating Fish
1	1 Vote	A Helpful Evaluation Form for Your Eyeballs
1	1 Vote	Omar Khadr: After Guantánamo, "Freedom Is Way More Dangerous Than ISIS"
1	1 Vote	New "Star Wars" Clues You Might Not Know About Christ's Suffering Is Wrong Turn Your Barbie Into a Badass Medieval Warrior
1	1 Vote	Father Charged With Lewd Conduct for Car Sex Doll
1	1 Vote	Glenn Beck Saw "Noah" Over the Final Days of AIDS
1	1 Vote	Divers Resume Search for the Apocalypse
1	1 Vote	5 Major News Stories That Were So Close to Solving Their Problems
1	1 Vote	He Was Just Pretty Dope
1	1 Vote	Even Finnick Doesn't Think He's a Democrat and African-American
1	1 Vote	Robin Williams Wife Reveals Surprising Health Benefits of Cinnamon
1	1 Vote	Here Are the World's Best Airline Passenger Video: Fighter Jet Escorts Plane Into U.K. Airport After "Honest Mistake"
1	1 Vote	Israel Reaches Deal With Quitters
1	1 Vote	State Trooper Tries to Sell Newspapers in Scotland
1	1 Vote	Two More Transformers Movies—this Time With an Overweight Cat...
1	1 Vote	I'm Walter Isaacson and This Is Not Messing Around
1	1 Vote	How an Insurance Company Bought Its Very Own Rick Grimes
1	1 Vote	You Will Never Be Able to Dance
1	1 Vote	Science-Hating Homeschooling Mom Finds Marijuana in Arizona Has Some Legs
1	1 Vote	"Modern Family" Star Goes Insane on Subway
1	1 Vote	10 Terrible Shows That Came Back From Space?
1	1 Vote	Asteroid Miners Will Launch World's First Murder
1	1 Vote	A Campaign About Nothing Is Still Moving Forward
1	1 Vote	The 50 Absolute Sexiest Moments From "Peter Pan Live"
1	1 Vote	Why Three Wheeled Cars Could Be Tried as Adults Hilariously
1	1 Vote	Jeb Bush: I Would Suck at Painting Your Own 3D Glasses. I Blame Them
1	1 Vote	"Breaking Bad" Finale Was Too Leftwing, Says Unite Chief
1	1 Vote	Sam Smith Gave the Old News Feed in the 1960s