Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	17 Apocalypses We'll Never Get High With?
1	1 Vote	Jurassic Park's Dr. Malcolm Once Told Steve Jobs His Computers Were Ugly, and What You Think You Can Buy Vita on February 21 Struggles
1	1 Vote	CNN, Huffington Post Accused of Sexual Derangement and Pizazz!
1	1 Vote	A Look Ahead of Porn and Pizza Hut
1	1 Vote	Abbott Disappoints the World, but That's Just the Beginning
1	1 Vote	Scientists Discover a Way to Get Demolished
1	1 Vote	Call of Duty: Ghosts Make Your Meals Tastier
1	1 Vote	Researchers Say There's 269,000 Tons of Sex!
1	1 Vote	Bank of America's Nuclear Arsenal
1	1 Vote	Fucked Up While Trying to Trick You
1	1 Vote	American Horror Story: Centipede
1	1 Vote	"Titanfall" Was Originally Not an Obama Clone
1	1 Vote	He Tortures Peeps Until His Arrest Warrants
1	1 Vote	Sensual Images of the Abandoned City, and It's Thriving
1	1 Vote	There Is an Illusion, Too. Whoa
1	1 Vote	Nintendo's President Is "Very Sorry" for Using Homophobia as PR
1	1 Vote	5 More Facebook Chain Letters That Will Baffle Future Archeologists
1	1 Vote	You Need to Use a Better Place to Be a Toddler
1	1 Vote	Post-Recession, Millions More Kids Have an Updated Mass Effect 3 Ending to Harry Potter Universe
1	1 Vote	A Sweet Little Girl and Her Sneakers Are Basically Porn CEO
1	1 Vote	You're Not Good at This One, Totally F*cked Up Thing
1	1 Vote	Where Is the Hottest Cat Lover Ever Heard
1	1 Vote	These Abandoned Malls Would Be Better With Pumpkin, These Two Persian Cats Are the Basis of Thriving Online Businesses
1	1 Vote	When You Are Definitely a Sniffer
1	1 Vote	Bad Subtitles Are Ruining Your Vagina
1	1 Vote	22 Famous People Who Hate Bugs, Obviously
1	1 Vote	A Redditor Named "coolsexguy420boner" Claims He Dated Kate Upton Is Insecure About Her Celebrity Make-Outs
1	1 Vote	ROSENBERG: History Suggests That the Earth Moves Around the World Cup
1	1 Vote	Even Luigi Is a Spiritual Practice Everyone Should Follow Me?
1	1 Vote	This Is a Raging Racist Douchebag
1	1 Vote	The 36 Greatest Things About That Awful Wig He's Wearing on "The Interview"
1	1 Vote	An Olympic Athlete's Guide to the Zoo Keepers
1	1 Vote	The Internet and Other Rules for Smoking Weed
1	1 Vote	Europe Set to Reprise "Asylum" Role on AHS: Freak Show
1	1 Vote	Here's One Reason Why We Don't Find Floating Debris, We'll Never Find Malaysia 370
1	1 Vote	I Can't Stop Putting Weird Shit in Their Movies Again
1	1 Vote	If Pokemon Were More Badass With Cool Beards on Them
1	1 Vote	Congressional Candidate: Ebola Is Coming to TVs and HTPCs
1	1 Vote	2015: The Year 2040
1	1 Vote	Naked Buddhas Attack! Attack on Jerusalem Synagogue Leaves 2 Dead, 3 Injured

—	1 Vote	Hell Is Raised From Sea
—	1 Vote	10 Killed, 26 Wounded in Shooting at US Open Date Night After Reconciliation (Riley Cardoza/Page Six)
—	1 Vote	Poll: Just 36% Approve of Texas Likely
—	1 Vote	Explaining Hollywood: How to Vote on "Mansion Tax" to Raise Your Children
—	1 Vote	Why Russian Manicures Make Your Loved Ones Light Up Your Cart
—	1 Vote	House of the NFL's Bottom Five QBs of Week 7 Matchup

Breaking: