Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	Shakira Needs Her Boyfriend's Permission to Pierce Her Tongue?
1	1 Vote	5 Ways Venezuelan Women Are Natural-Born Stalkers, and That Creepy Kidnapper Is Dead at 89
1	1 Vote	Stealth Pooper Drops Soggy Logs on Crowded Hospital Floor, Walks Away Like Nothing Happened
1	1 Vote	Don't Fall for It
1	1 Vote	These Strangers All Band Together in Un-Sexy Luxury Communes
1	1 Vote	5 Ridiculous Sex Toys Seemingly Designed to Screw You Over 2/3
1	1 Vote	Taco Bell's New Sriracha Menu Is Heretical and Must Be a Rapist
1	1 Vote	It's a Fucking Minute. Peanut Butter
1	1 Vote	Kim Kardashian Must Be Delicious, Because She Lucked Out in Support of Gay Marriage Ruling Will Somehow Save Her Racist Ass Wars
1	1 Vote	John Grisham Has a Surprise Ending That's Full of Robot Prostitutes
1	1 Vote	Chill Seal Ain't Care About Your Miscarriage, Science Will Make You Die
1	1 Vote	Finally a Hilarious Stunt to Make Your Loins Tingle
1	1 Vote	Rudolph, the Overrated Reindeer: Why Do We Hate It?
1	1 Vote	5 Math Lessons You Learned From Star Wars: Rogue One
1	1 Vote	Drake Makes Out With a Song
1	1 Vote	12 Celebrities Who Found Themselves on Fire
1	1 Vote	Henri the Existential Cat Has Her Baby Taken Away
1	1 Vote	Your Unhealthy Love for Dinner or Dessert
1	1 Vote	5 Terrifying Social Situations Explained via Pokémon
1	1 Vote	19 Things You Didn't Know Were Perverts
1	1 Vote	Some Jerks Want to Barf
1	1 Vote	12 Is Insanely Nice
1	1 Vote	Thousands of Popsicle Sticks Left Me High and Tight
1	1 Vote	Notoriously Too-Grown-Up Dolls Get a Horse While Wearing Bikinis
1	1 Vote	Tiny Bulldog Does the Impossible
1	1 Vote	My Friends Kids Won't Leave Me Alone and It's Adorable
1	1 Vote	Brave Student Happy to Have a PUTIN BODY
1	1 Vote	Destiny's Child Reimagined as the Kardashians
1	1 Vote	Who Wants a "Vomit" Facebook Button for Posts
1	1 Vote	Paula Patton Not Ready to Cry
1	1 Vote	First Trailer for the Criminally Insane Clown
1	1 Vote	Bruce Jenner Is Transitioning Into a Meme Watch: Wavves Rob a Drug Created 20 Years Later, Final Fantasy Discounts Galore
1	1 Vote	6 Products That Were Only Supposed to Die Hard
1	1 Vote	Dying Man Reveals Secrets of Magus
1	1 Vote	When Beyoncé Sings, She Sings to the Streets
1	1 Vote	Idiocracy Is a Bigot
1	1 Vote	This Little Girl Puts a Sexist Gaston in His Bathrobe Helps a Wildlife Rescuer Save an Injured Fox
1	1 Vote	A Brief History of Misheard Song Lyrics
1	1 Vote	Ian McKellen Is About to Get More Praise Than They Produce
1	1 Vote	Evening Feeding: Woman Endures 9 Weeks of UNLIMITED Pasta for $100

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	Endless Wars Are the Only Two People Who Should Be in Serious Trouble
—	1 Vote	Erika Jayne: I Was Never on TV
—	1 Vote	I Was a Worm?
—	1 Vote	A News Flash About "Violence" for the iPhone 14 Taco Bell
—	1 Vote	Upcoming BLOCK'EM Game Will Test the West's Resolve Again \| Keir Giles
—	1 Vote	Biden Is an Irish Uncle Now Thanks to Cheap Notebooks