Headline Smasher | Stupidly Funny Computer-Generated Fake Headlines

1	1 Vote	How to Get Distracted by Each Other's Good Vision
1	1 Vote	Buy Some New BFFs
1	1 Vote	Chelsea Manning May Transfer to Civilian Prison for Felony Cocaine Possession
1	1 Vote	Chicago Police Commander Allegedly Shoved His Gun in a Philippine Refugee Camp
1	1 Vote	The Best Girlfriend He's Ever Taken From Space Ep. 2: Pooping in Yale's Student Laundry Rooms and Ruining Everyone's Clothes
1	1 Vote	Mike & Mike Allowed a Tweet From @FuckItThough22 to Appear Asian
1	1 Vote	New Bill to Stop Photographing Her Asleep
1	1 Vote	Treating Advanced Cancer in Older Adults Hilariously
1	1 Vote	Man City Ready to BUST Out of It? Yep!
1	1 Vote	10 Reasons Why You Don't Sound Like a Hooker in His Lung
1	1 Vote	First Year, She Said She Was 9/11 Museum Is Now Powered by Mashed Potatoes
1	1 Vote	45 Reasons I Miss College Prostitution
1	1 Vote	Cheese Is Addictive Like Drugs So I Visited a Church... Why Wasn't I Surprised?
1	1 Vote	U2 Paid Tribute to Grandmas Everywhere
1	1 Vote	And Now, a Cat Stuck
1	1 Vote	Kanye West Looks PISSED That Every Bro Goes to 4chan for Assistance
1	1 Vote	22 Things That Will Make You Look as Unrealistically Sexy as a Canadian Shopping at an International Spirits Competition
1	1 Vote	Here's What Happens When You Hang It, People Cry From Happiness
1	1 Vote	Wearing Out Your Undead
1	1 Vote	HoloLens Will Play the Villain in Peter Pan Adaptation
1	1 Vote	Here's Every GIF of Drake as Bart Simpson
1	1 Vote	Ask Polly: How Do You Even Incest Bro?
1	1 Vote	David Petraeus Made a Ton of Money!!!
1	1 Vote	Brain Game: Stan the Man Who Burned Face Praying Over Sizzling Fajitas Can't Sue for Sexual Harassment
1	1 Vote	Wal-Mart Workers Complain Stores Are Too Smart for Manual Labor
1	1 Vote	The Dude's Trust Level Is Over in Liberia, Continues in Asia's Financial Markets
1	1 Vote	White House Summit on Violent Extremism Opens With Muslim Blogger Who Doesn't Love Strawberries!?
1	1 Vote	Absolutely Unacceptable: Hibernating Bear Run Over That Homeless Guy's Cart
1	1 Vote	My Radical Self-Love Meant Cutting Off All Womenswear, Including Shoes for 24 Hours?
1	1 Vote	Gwyneth Paltrow for a New Jewish BF So I'm Selling Mine
1	1 Vote	Chris Pratt Is Actually a Secret Language
1	1 Vote	21 Pieces of Classical Music That Showed Up Drunk to Team Meeting, May Have a Resilient Vagina!
1	1 Vote	Gambit Rumors Circle Shane Black and R.L. Stine
1	1 Vote	Just Some Reasons Why Anticonformity Is Worse Than Watergate
1	1 Vote	Here's How DOMA Is Like Bad Domino's Pizza Hut
1	1 Vote	7 Ways "Hey Arnold" Taught You to Gaze Into RoboCop's Eyes
1	1 Vote	Howard Stern Bashes Jay Leno Returning to WWII in 1943
1	1 Vote	Christy Mack -- Throws "Coming Out" Party ... At the Knees
1	1 Vote	Pope Francis to Meet Taylor Swift
1	1 Vote	Kevin Smith Hints at Console Plans

Breaking:

—	1 Vote	If You Can Identify the Celebrities Who Are You?
—	1 Vote	Dozens of Schools Across the United States
—	1 Vote	The Best Way to Oblivion
—	1 Vote	What Happened to the Outdoors
—	1 Vote	The Cultural Significance of Tattoos Around the Moon
—	1 Vote	New Threatened Species Action Plan Aims for No Reason