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Voted Headlines
263
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Girls Just Want to Rage Quit
477
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Experts Say Not to Exist
32
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The Pizza-Paved Path to the Afghanistan War
62
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Don't Forget Donald Trump Is the Worst
58
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Texas Is Being Shitty for Sport
56
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Climate Change Could Alter the Taste of Your Sofa
99
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Actors Who've Died This Year or Early Next Month
132
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1999 Called — It Looks Fun as Heck
88
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How to Watch Yourself Being Killed
103
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Florida Man Caught Three Whole Diseases From a Place of Healing and Forgiveness
193
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Trump's Official Schedule Says He Will Be Destroyed Friday Noon
142
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Chris Pratt May Be Heading for Extinction
137
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HBO Has Quietly Removed All of Puerto Rico
124
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Hit Me With Your Milk Supply
431
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I'm About to Get Worse!
74
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I Think I Have DELICATE SKIN
86
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The List: The 34,361 Men, Women and Children in Your Kitchen
66
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California Plans to Colonize ASTEROIDS?
98
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Scientists Discover How to Download a Video Game, and More!
41
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A Baby Bear From a Planet Called Squeetor
48
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Kentucky Baptist Minister Explains How to Find and Destroy Spooky TV Sets
122
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Woman, 19, Discovers She Was Born
44
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Walmart Says It Is "Pushing Division and Pushing Lies"
34
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Why We Need to Have Sex With Patients
39
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Anger as Poland Plans Law That Does Nothing
146
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It's Time We All Cried
99
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I May Have Had a Threesome. Now It's Fighting Back
78
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SCOTUS Delivers One Last Death Knell for Humanity
48
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44 Things That'll Help Make Your Penis Look Smaller
68
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Eating Pasta Made From Sewage Sludge
62
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That's It, I Quit Crying
35
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Tiger Woods Returns to Steal Hedge Clippers
70
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I Saw My Son by Mistake
74
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Here's What's Coming to Destroy Capitalism
190
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Multiple People Are Women
47
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"Pathetic" Fox News Exclusive
43
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Apple Doesn't Give a Sh*t!
46
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D.C. Weddings Only Permitted if No One Is Safe
74
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I Don't Mean to Alarm You, but I Know Your Seasonal Food Preferences
127
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Natural Ways to Fuck Off Forever