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Headline Smasher

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The Time Walter Cronkite Was Zapped Into the Woods
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Trump Urges Republicans to Shift Stance to Embrace Animal Imperfections
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Don't STOP! DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP!
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Mario Batali Has a Thigh Gap
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Prince William Loves to Smell the Fonz
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Ask a Mortician: Do You Hate to Admit That Biodiesel Is Worse Than AIDS
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Human Rights Group Welcomes Obama's Decision to Send His Kids to Eat a Mini Cupcake at Lane Bryant Opening
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Fat-Shaming Actually Leads to Great Deal on Used Mattress
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Get a System and 3 Games for $500 Million
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Police Mistake Prince Andrew for an iPad Mini
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Corgis Could Become Uninsured Under Paul Ryan's Budget
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Report: Lamar Odom Is Addicted to Makeup
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Former Bell Labs Head Abandons Bid to Kill Her Highness
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Schwarzenegger Was in a Holding Cell Drank Own Urine to Survive the Apocalypse
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Gia Allemand Menstruation Made Her an Icon
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Killzone 3 Officially on Christ's Radar
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Tea Party Was Founded as a Rad Metal Song
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Best App Ever Lets You Hate-Search Decades of NYT Weddings
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NASA Plans to Send and Reply to Email
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Rage Gifs -- When You Put Ecstasy in Your Dishwasher
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Watch Somebody Play a Wacky Game to Decide Who Lives and Who Dies
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Anonymous Just Leaked a Trove of Whale Fossils
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Orphaned Tiger Cubs Find a Senator in a Big Feathery Fur Pile
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It's a Bird, It's a Beer in Your History Class
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Jeff Goldblum's "O" Face to Honor 9/9/99
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Young People Are Consistently Dour, Survey Suggests
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A Gay Bar Mitzvah
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Woman Distracted by Texting Drives Her Car Into a Hilarious Performance
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31 "Celebrities" Who Are Also Jerks
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Mark Zuckerberg Wants to Kill Me
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The Military Budget Has Just Released Two Heavy Metal Christmas Covers
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Of Course Rihanna Is Legit Crying Like a Frat on Steroids, Says Former Female Employee
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How to Make Love to Pickle: "Fuck Em All"
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The Week in Tabloids: Katy Perry's Boobs Are No Longer Offering Health Benefits to Part-Timers
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What It's Like to Think Your Lady Detectives Are Slutty Sluts
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Pandemic Shutdown Leads to Ridiculous Hamburger
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The Extinct Were-Beasts of the Bathroom Closet
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1 in 3 Women Held Captive for 30 years
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Using Gyroscopes and Cat Math to Find Your One True Soul Mate
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A Beloved World Leader Goes on Massacres