chapter3

Voted Headlines
24
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Romney Refuses to Say Cheese
23
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Shia LaBeouf Is Really Fucking Lazy
33
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66 Million Girls Under 14 Give Birth on Hospital Lawn After Nurses Wouldn't Even Open the Door
78
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Car Theft Is Only Okay When It's Done by Caveladies, Not Cavemen
228
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Valve Engineer Wants to Warn You About Its People-Eating Vortex
27
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Lego Space Shuttle Grounded Again
454
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Members of Congress, I Will Punch You in Less Than 2 Min
134
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18-Year-Old Girl's Last Request for Something Other Than Cat Memes and Instagram Selfies
29
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Drunk Quotes From Evil Millionaires
299
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Survey: Not All Opinions Are Valid
200
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You Suck Because I Have a Moustache
129
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Kanye West Ranting for Over 17 Years
172
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France Will Not Be Here Tomorrow
161
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This Shirtless Hunk Wants to Carve Out Your Vertebrae
129
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What It's Like to Be Paid
66
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29 States Can Fire You for Being Perez Hilton
115
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Fuck Today, Let's Look at THIS CAT
52
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Ridiculously Hot Dude in a Bookstore, Proves Bookstores Are Still Useful
142
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And the Moon Explodes
197
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41,000,006 Reasons Why Santa Is Sexy
69
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I Think This Girl Traveled Over 7,000 Miles to Tell Martha Stewart Her Food Tweets Are Disgusting
90
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Microsoft Ready for Dat Booty
49
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Man Forced to Do More Televised Musicals
51
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Solving the Mystery of Hitler's Monkeys
85
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Source: 80-Year-Old Arrested for Carrying Archie Comics
27
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Overambitious Cat Gets Stuck in Your Selfie
107
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Four Guys + One Grand Piano = the Most Painfully Awkward Things That Al-Qaeda Spent Money On
429
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Meet Wolf Cop, Canada's Greatest Werewolf With a Revolver
5
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This Is What It Is?
52
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25 Heartwarming Facts That Will Inspire Your Faith in Humanity, Penises
183
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The Terrifying, NSFW Truth of Eating a Burrito
298
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So I Woke Up in Flames
14
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Zooey Deschanel Bans Fans From Photographing Her While High on Shrooms
2
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Pakistan's New Mud Volcano Is Spewing Flammable Gas Prices
706
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Tumblr Has a Terrible Idea
170
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All of Us Are Super Annoying
76
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Oxygen Is Older Than We Expected
145
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The Sun Has Been Cancelled
170
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Don't Look at THIS CAT
111
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Mummified Body of Woman Found Alive