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37,727 smashes / 61,933 upvotes / smashed from 104,726 real headlines
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Special Ed Teacher Has Sex With Teen Girl at Airport Attack Business Insider Jezebel New York Times
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Metallica Enters Therapy in Some Ways The A.V. Club New York Times
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Business Briefing: Barbecue Chain to Drop Drake as "Global Ambassador" New York Times Pitchfork
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I Would Be Even Better Off the Track at 280 MPH Business Insider BuzzFeed New York Times
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Letters: When Baby Pictures Offend the Law Firm Jezebel New York Times
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Obama Tweets Against Scottish Independence Day 24: Contemplations of Identity Business Insider New York Times
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"Avatar" Actor Arrested in Steroid Case New York Times ZergNet
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30 Productivity Hacks From Shakira's "Empire" Video Showing Business Insider New York Times ZergNet
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Bombs Close to Being Attractive BuzzFeed New York Times
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What to Do to Improve Your Facebook Friends With More Impregnation? BuzzFeed io9 Jezebel New York Times
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The Pains of Being Raised by a Television Review: Amazon's Fire TV Is Still Relevant Business Insider BuzzFeed New York Times Pitchfork ZergNet
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Stars Who Got Really Ugly for a Housemate, Not a Gym Class Hero BuzzFeed New York Times ZergNet
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Man Who Helped Define Your Favorite Soda Says About Drunk Driving BuzzFeed io9 New York Times Upworthy
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19 Things From Childhood You Should Be Arrested for Alleged Plagiarism and a Well-Timed Response Business Insider BuzzFeed New York Times Upworthy ZergNet
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This Girl Got Asked if She Could Hear His Tearful Plea to the Ocean New York Times Upworthy
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A Slimy Truth That Will Ever Take Two Friends Killed, One Injured After Going Into Icy Chicago River to River Festival BuzzFeed io9 New York Times Upworthy
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The Betty White Meme: When the Simpsons and Sexual Frustration Got Me Thinking Like Monty Python? So Does Superstar Physicist Brian Cox The A.V. Club Business Insider BuzzFeed Cracked New York Times
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Supreme Court Defeat in Her Seat Business Insider New York Times
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Paul and Linda McCartney: Ram Trucks The A.V. Club New York Times
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Yves Carcelle, Empire Builder at Louis Vuitton, Dies at 28 Words BuzzFeed New York Times
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Essay: The Face of Sexism, Totally Rocks Biology Career Jezebel New York Times Upworthy
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This Crocodile Uses Tools to Map Portfolios io9 New York Times
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Life for Refugees, and the Golden Gate Bridge: Who Destroyed It Best? BuzzFeed io9 New York Times
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Here Is the New York Dirt Track, Witness Says Jezebel New York Times
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Creepy Clown With Voice of a Serene Soul Jezebel New York Times
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3 Telltale Signs Your Sweet Tooth Is Out for Season Opener BuzzFeed Cracked New York Times
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Mourners Gather for Funeral of New York Fashion Week: Sportmax Spring/Summer 2015 New York Times
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10 Horror Movies Ruined for Us to Flip a House of Course Rihanna Is Totally Winning Lottery Business Insider BuzzFeed Jezebel New York Times ZergNet
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Chinese Authorities Make Arrests in Attempt to Hide Stolen Rolexes in Their Halloween Costumes for 2013 io9 Jezebel New York Times
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Jessica Simpson to Help ISIS Militants in Love With Everybody Else, on Tomorrow People Are We Here? Business Insider io9 Jezebel New York Times
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The Fix Isn't in Space? The A.V. Club New York Times
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A Brooklyn Bridge Mystery: Who Raised the White House Business Insider New York Times
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Grueling 39K-Mile Yacht Race Tests the Sanity of Cramped Crews Fighting in Gaza Bomb-Disposal Accident Fox News New York Times Wired
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Plane vs. Conveyer Belt: Hell Yeah the Plane Takes Off the GOP's Social Agenda Huffington Post Mental Floss New York Times
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Bits Blog: Toward a Childproof Internet Slang BuzzFeed New York Times
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Yankees 3, Orioles 2: Yankees Halt Orioles to Show Us Your Frankenstorm Food Stash Jezebel New York Times
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Grumpy Cat Stars in Trentemøller and Jana Hunter's "Gravity" Video Claims Business Insider New York Times Pitchfork
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Abercrombie Just Got a Melodramatic Movie Review: Google's New Office in Amsterdam Is Full of Unfortunate Haikus Business Insider Cracked Jezebel New York Times Upworthy
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Pussy Riot's Got a Bill. And They Applaud and Join Global Treaty Jezebel New York Times Upworthy
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Editorial: Saving Daughters From Accessing Birth Control Is a Threat to National Security Experts Business Insider Jezebel New York Times