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2,194 smashes / 3,874 upvotes / smashed from 5,075 real headlines
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Man on First Date Inexplicably Asks for Bailout Before He Goes to a Change of Scenery
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How to Protect 300,000,34,974,000 Sandwich Selling Jobs. More Soon American Thinker
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Death Penalty for Maligning a Building's Feng Shui New York Times
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I Help People Afford Cauliflower Steaks. More Soon New York Times
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Democrats 2020 Choice: Do They Want to Continue Teaching Glasgow Kiss MacRumors New York Times
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Trump Says He Made Comments About Playing a Transgender Man, Drops Out of Your Textbooks The Week Thought Catalog
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Support America's Most Influential Bowel Movements in Ten Days Facebook Challenge BroBible Uproxx
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Banksy Asks for Bailout Before He Officially Ordered Curb on COVID-19 Treatment BroBible The Raw Story
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Conservatives and Lib Dems to Trade Insults The Guardian
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Canceling the Cancel Counter: Statue of Edward Colston Declared Innocent After Failing to Float. More Later CounterPunch National Review
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Maybe Take Up Golf Cheezburger
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Pornhub Video Briefly Plays on New York Primary Schools Instyle
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COVID Fear Is Keeping Chronically Ill People From Their Phones. More Soon Huffington Post
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Centenarians Who Haven't Raised Millions for the Confederacy? Twitchy
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FBI Warning: Mobile Banking Scams Are Going on Behind Closed Doors Fast Company NPR
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Trump Appears When It Remembers Which Day It Is. More Soon The Independent
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Dominic Raab Thought Juneteenth Was a Massive Deception The Guardian Infowars
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Oakland's Antonio Brown Says He Is Going to Be Carved Onto Mount Rushmore | Jonathan Wilson Alternet The Guardian New York Post
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Top Ten Memes of the Mullet Cheezburger
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Man Who Robbed Shop at Walmart if You Don't The Blaze
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Aloe Vera to Be Eliminated New York Times
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Being a C*nt Not an SNL Fan? Cheezburger
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Here's How to Get the Hang of It Fast Company MacRumors
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Welcome to the Mafia Zerohedge
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New BBC Sitcom Starts Filming Today Two Pints of Lager and a CAR The Daily Mail
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Enthusiastic Trump Promises to Give More Details About His Flirty Texts to Colleague Instyle Mirror
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Samsung Secretly Working on a Beer Hunt…from 4th July BroBible The Sun
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Don't Let Them Re-Open. More Soon National Review
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Tory Government Being Propped Up by Steven Spielberg PC Gamer
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PM Johnson Disappointed Not to Shut Down The Federalist
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Liam Neeson to Become World's Only Superpower Newsmax
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Trump Campaign to Reduce Risk by Walking Alone. More Soon Newsmax
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Theresa Villiers Too Dim to Realise She Was Bitten "By an Adder" The Daily Mail
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Brits Only Going to Be Released Next Month Breitbart The Independent
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Thousands Shout I Can't Do It NY Daily News
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Top New Game Releases in the Bins. More Soon GameSpot
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California Couple Charged With Urinating Less Than $40 Mashable Naturalnews
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Arrest Warrant Out for Fresh Box of Ferrero Rocher. More Soon CNN
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Welsh Children to Be Hit With $5 Billion LifeSite
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Carpet Fitter Who Died From a Laboratory Hacker News