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49,125 smashes / 120,996 upvotes / smashed from 35,097 real headlines
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California Elementary School Punishes 11-Year-Old Student by Forcing Him to Give Kids Blisters Business Insider io9
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Thanksgiving Foods That Are Scaring the Crap Out of Their Way to Sell Your Daughter for 3 Goats and a Privacy Nightmare The A.V. Club Business Insider Cracked io9 Jezebel Upworthy
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Watch Speedy Ortiz, Glasser, More Set for a White Christmas Already? Drudge Report io9 Pitchfork
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Louisville Favored in Final Four, but Wichita State Could Become One of Nature's Most Unusual Bioweapons FiveThirtyEight io9
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Behold Handwritten Pages From the Who-Ville Picayune, January, 1958 io9 McSweeny's
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New York's One World Trade Center Declared Tallest Building in U.S. Prisons Are Everywhere. See for Yourself! Huffington Post io9 NPR Two Way
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What's the Right to Rock Writer The A.V. Club Giant Bomb io9
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9 Incredibly Nice Animals Who Failed So Hard at One Guy's Non-Attempt to Save Them? BuzzFeed io9 Upworthy
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Snow White's Mom Says io9 Jezebel
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When This Homeless Man Who Would Benefit From Watching This Video Shows the Difference Between Necessary and Unnecessary Bad Science? FaithIt Free Republic Gizmodo HitFix io9 Sploid Upworthy
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Ben Affleck's Batman Will Be Part of Khufu Pyramid io9
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Ukraine Offensive Stalled by Insugents, Lack of Child-Eating Gnomes Revealed Fox News io9
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These New Legs Will Help You Check io9 Upworthy
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The 13 Most Disturbing "Pokemon" Facts About a Delusional Stegosaurus Cracked io9 ZergNet
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The Two Stages of Payday BuzzFeed io9
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Apple Engineer Explains the Ending Business Insider io9
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Train Full of TV Shows for Kids Learn to Use Each Other for the Ultimate Puddle Jump Fail Distractify io9 Lifehacker Mashable ThinkProgress Wired
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Four Galaxies Are Smashed Together in a Confusing Samsung Galaxy S5 Features We Want to Play Pitchfork Events During CMJ Sued The A.V. Club Business Insider io9 Pitchfork
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Is Mars Ruled by B.S Cracked io9
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Bob Marley Biopic Will Stream on Facebook, Enable Stoner Reggae Fans to Believe You've Slept The A.V. Club io9 ZergNet
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Apparently Danny Trejo Is Starring in Generic Crime Thriller The A.V. Club io9
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A Sommelier Chooses His 10 Favorite Wines for $16 or Less Than Business Insider io9
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Watch Richard Simmons Crash a Wedding With a Door Stop Forever io9 Jezebel
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Colin Jost Is the Leading Cause of Aging BuzzFeed io9 Upworthy
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New Trailer for the First World Cup Deadspin io9 Jezebel
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19 People Questioning Their Humanity for Not Crying During The Spider-Man 2 Panel BuzzFeed io9
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15 Kids Hand Turkeys That Are About to Become Instantly Smarter BuzzFeed Cracked io9 ZergNet
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What Are the People Who Don't Chase Fugitives in a Quandary The A.V. Club Business Insider BuzzFeed io9
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Grumpy Cat Gets a Reboot io9 Jezebel
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5 Gender Stereotypes Be Damned, Men Are Trained to Sniff Out Land Mines Cracked io9 Upworthy
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Billionaire Businessman Says Government Should Have Ended, Seriously FiveThirtyEight io9 ThinkProgress
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Frank Ocean Is on the Toilet Plunger io9 Jezebel Pitchfork
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Plague Inc. Dev Teams Up With Google Search Tricks io9 Lifehacker Polygon
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The Linen Closet Makes Me Want to Explore the Ocean Floor With Half-Crab-Half-Car Behemoth io9 Jezebel ZergNet
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NBC Gives Another YouTube Star a Crime-Solving Sigmund Freud The A.V. Club io9
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Why the NSA Know About the Inauguration Yesterday io9 Jezebel Pitchfork
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Everything You Need to Do It Right Gizmodo io9 Lifehacker
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This Robot's Facial Expressions Are Being Discriminated Against in Vietnam io9 Kotaku
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The Great Gawker Mario Kart Cart Is All Sex, Sex, Murder, Sex, Car, Sex Assault Deadspin io9 Kotaku Sploid
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Who's the Latest Fighting Game That Lets You Smell Meat on Your Head Explode Gizmodo io9 Polygon Sploid