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49,125 smashes / 120,996 upvotes / smashed from 35,097 real headlines
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The Western Black Rhino Is Extinct (Again), and It's Devastating io9 Upworthy
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Amazing Video Reveals How It Can Be Thwarted With a Grain of Salt io9 Jezebel New York Times Lede
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In the World's First Proper RTS Game, Right in Your Lunch Bag Defamer io9 Kotaku Lifehacker
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Securing a Linux Kernel Will Make Snacks Safer Hacker News io9
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Which Browser Is Better Than Everyone Else io9 Lifehacker TMZ
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Which Musician Is Getting Remade... Again Defamer io9
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Scientists Have Created Remote Controlled Cyborg Sperm Wars io9
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Bundle of Tentacles Gives Your Gaming Group a Dose of Eldritch Horror Movies io9 Jezebel
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DNA From Canadian Family Confirms Identity of King Joffrey Defamer io9
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Animals Have Learned to FLY PLANES io9 Jezebel
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Are Gut Bacteria the Reason Your Grandma Would Want an Xbox Live BLOG Giant Bomb io9 Kotaku Polygon
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The Indiana Jones 4: Don't Hold Your Valentine Defamer FaithIt io9
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Celebrating Ten Years on Mars Curiosity Captures Both Martian Moons in a Foreign President. It Didn't Go So Well... io9 Upworthy
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Puzzling Over a Picture of a Volcanic Eruption, as Seen From Space Dandy BuzzFeed io9 Jezebel New York Times Lede
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Australia Is an Amazing Thrill Ride io9 Upworthy
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Practice Your Ninja Skills With the Portland Water Bureau io9 New York Times Lede
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The One Thing to Happen Because of Limb Regeneration BuzzFeed io9 Jezebel Upworthy
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Hey, Girl: Ryan Gosling and Matt Smith and U2 Will Be Helping Rich Kids Get Into the Fiery Forge of Hephaestus BuzzFeed io9 Upworthy
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U.N. Security Council Strongly Condemns North Korea's Nuclear Test So That We Can't Tell You What to Trust Instead CNN io9 Kotaku Lifehacker Upworthy
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Subway Car Prank That's Downright Cold War-Inspired io9 The Chive Upworthy
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Obama Visit to Friday 13th's Real-Life Camp Crystal Lake io9 New York Times Lede
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Aliens or Republicans: One Wants to Star in Joan Didion Movie io9 Jezebel Upworthy
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The Night Belongs to Elvis and His Ass, on a New Yorker's Hurricane Experience, as Told by "Mean Girls" Valentine's Day Three BuzzFeed io9 Jezebel New York Times Lede
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Nine Stories That Will Make You Smell Less Attractive to the Catholic Church HotAir io9 Jezebel The Blaze
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Wanting to Be Racist io9 Jezebel
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The First Time. The First Baseball Pitch…and the Catcher Was Her Dad Home From Afghanistan — a Terrifying Home Invasion FaithIt io9 The Blaze Upworthy
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It's Not Even Close FaithIt io9 Kotaku
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The Most Adorable Zombie Ever: Check Out the Window io9 Jezebel Upworthy
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Literally Anyone, Like Anyone, Can Be Allergic to Water Parks and Rec on the Mic! BuzzFeed io9 Jezebel
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How a 14-Year-Old Girl Snapped One Fashion Mag Into a Microscope io9 Upworthy
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Affectionate Lion Cubs Will Make You So SAD? io9 Jezebel
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Akira Movie Lives On, Despite Everyone Trying to Eat Pomegranate BuzzFeed io9
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Growing Up in Front of the Day After the Megavolcano, Life as a Feminist Porn Star Wars BuzzFeed io9 Jezebel Upworthy
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Which Way America: Labor Management Collaboration or a Mad Population? Huffington Post io9
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To Hell With These Scifi-Themed Computer Components io9 Kotaku
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Elizabeth Vargas Opens Up About a Gay Bar Working a Rainbow Colored Igloo Made From Whale Baleen Gawker io9 Jezebel The Chive
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9 Joyful Ways to Suck BuzzFeed io9
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Obama Is the Densest Object Orbiting the Solar System CNS News io9
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Pretty Dresses and Hot Messes of the Day: Sewage and Statistics Edition io9 Jezebel
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Julia Roberts's Half-Sister, Nancy Motes, Found Dead Ostrich io9 Jezebel