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Headline Smasher

Real news remixed into fake news.
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Prince Harry Can't Hold My Jockstrap
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How to Get Brutally Destroyed
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Study: Being Abused Is Not Recommended
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So Florida May Have Psychic Abilities
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6-Year-Old Given Detention, Forced to Apologize to the International Space Station
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Need to Wait for <insert Here>
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Worst Crossover Ever: Hitler Joins the Alliance
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Here's Katy Perry's Shark Dancing to Classical Music? … … Okay
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New Resident Evil 5 Has a Penis-Shaped Bong and Cockroaches
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Europe Reacts to Howard Dean's Weird Dye job
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Romney to Claim That Gays Spread AIDS on Purpose
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Oregon Braces for "Mass Distribution" of Free Burritos
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Mundane Activities Made Amazing by Performing Them in Limbo
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Almonds Are the Future, but They Can't Vote -- So Whatever
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Let's Go "Balls Deep" Into the Future, Get Spit Back Out
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Lawmakers Say HELLO!
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How to Be Sexually Degraded
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An Agenda to Make the "Perfect" Foam Finger
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"Catbutt" Is Not the System
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How Not to Cry
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A Wildfire Was Extra Close to Getting Called Out
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How Government Officials Are Using Twitter for Sexist Attacks
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This Is What Happens Next
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There's an Actual Thing
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Police Searching for Gunman Who Killed 2 in Offline Mode
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Proposed Bill: Reject Handgun Permits for Any Manga Fan
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What Will Happen if Superman Punched You in the Deep-Sea Minefield
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This Doctor Had a Breakdown, Saw a Therapist, and Ended Up in Absurd Shouting Match With Jewish Voter
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Teen Is in a Bubble!
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Pussy Riot Has Gone From Murder and Violence to Chocolates and Spending
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False FLAGS WON'T STOP the Terminator
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Katy Perry's Boobs Are No Longer Allowed on the Field
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Chris Christie Is Much Scarier Than Putting a Needle in Your Belly Button?
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Teen Jailed for Upskirt Pictures at Oklahoma Graduation
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Baby Reportedly Cured of HIV Infection Could Lead to New Miss America
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Your Vagina Is Worth Nearly $600,000
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Kanye West to Run Somewhere Else
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Outraged Dems Vow to Build "Wall"
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Hallucinations and $100,000: The Poker Player Who Shut Himself in a Suitcase for Traveling Overseas?
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Sydney Leathers Is Selling Jesus Christ's Toenails