nearlydyed

Saved Headlines
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Facebook Rolls Out Missiles, Other Weaponry at Annual Parade
309
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CIA, FBI Launch Manhunt for a Stupid Guy
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Open YOUR EYES Until They Explode
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Nothing Is Wrong With My Wife
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UPDATE: Mini Horses Now Allowed to Smoke or Vape Marijuana
220
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Why People Are Disgusting
220
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4000 Year Old F**k Boi. Damn Fine
207
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Every KISS BEGINS WITH an Xbox One X, or Nintendo Switch
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Its Not That Complicated Guys I'm So Hungry
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Americans Prefer to Remain Ignorant
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Charlie and the Great Depression
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I Feel Lost: Notre Dame Fire Destroyed Centuries Worth of Red Bull
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It's Empty...right? It's Empty...right? It's Empty...right? Right??
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3 Things You'll Notice if Your Piss Smells Like Fried Chicken
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Google's Latest Attempt to Improve Your Masturbation Routine
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Woman Jumps From Moving UBER to Avoid Awkwardness
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Same-Sex Penguin Couple Is Charged in Murder-For-Hire Plot
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National Security Is the New Mario Kart
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Kevin Spacey Says Sexual Assault Rules
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I'm Non-Binary and I Can't Play Pac-Man
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Pelosi: "We Want to Murder Everyone"
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Kids Removed From Lungs
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Trump Growing Increasingly Frustrated at Wolves
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Samsung Is Prepping to Release Prisoners
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Now It'll Cost You $20 to Hike Up Yosemite's Half Dome, if You're a Fuckboy
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Sheriff: Officer Kills Man Who Can See Through Walls
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Priest Attacked by Dog, Then Bitten by a Lamp?
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Tim Cook Appears to Have "twisted" Living Babies Heads Off Their Necks
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How to Have Sex With a $25 Gift Card
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Cleopatra Should Be Playing Mario
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This Is My New Mom Who Is Unable to Sell Your Unwanted Crap
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Disney Announces Plans for Giant Mosque
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Woman, Baby Fall in Love With Whiskey
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Trump: We Have All the Sunscreen!
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12 Chewbacca Memes That Sum Up Your Feelings on the Toilet
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Motorcyclist Gets Hit by Apple Quietly
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Pig With Ice Cream Flavor
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"Russian Spy" Working at a Planet Fitness
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Sometimes You Just Need to Fight With Trump Spontaneously
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Bury Underwear in Your Guacamole