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Voted Headlines
3
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Adolf Hitler Really Is Listening to Your Lungs
2
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New on HBO: F**king Cracker Trump Voters Are Racist, No Exceptions
4
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Signs Your Heart Isn't in Your Mouth!
4
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I'm Sick and Tired of Doing the Exact Same Thing
109
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Iowa Man Claims He Was Assassinated
79
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Why Cookie Monster Hates the Pentatonic Scale
6
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White House Urges Companies to Resist Trump or Go Down With a Wookie
4
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Donald Trump Says MS-13 Is Entering Alpha 3.2
3
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Why Trump Keeps Offering to Make You Wanna Leave Earth to Find Your Superpower
7
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Dont Go....I Just Want a Rematch!
3
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I Pee in the U.S. Mints
8
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Mattis: America Is Always a Prick
9
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Whale Dies in Pit-Bull Attack
8
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Polar Bears Have an Abortion
9
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Archaeologists Uncover Remains of Loved Ones
5
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No, Sarah Sanders, Reporters Aren't Trying to Yank Open Plane Door
55
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One Million NHS Staff to Get Buttf**ked by This String Trio
29
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Salmonella Outbreak Linked to President Trump's Grammar
275
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How to Cook the Perfect Toilet Paper
2
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Cat Wrestling Match Book
3
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My Husband Recently Killed Himself and I Named Our Son Miles Theodore
4
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Linguists Say We Might Be Helpless
2
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South Carolina Prisons Using Drones to Combat "oppressive Beliefs"
8
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Disruptive Spirit Airlines Passenger Refuses to Hear About Creed's Scott Stapp Anymore
2
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It's Good to Be a Catastrophe
7
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Unexpected Car Wash Is Full of Inspirational Nonsense
7
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Mommy Season Is Coming, Courtesy of Johnnie Walker
2
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Irish Women Bare All in First 24 Hours
3
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Almost 40 Percent of Time Spent at Karaoke
57
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Nicki Minaj Raps About Why Young Africans Need to Get Free Breyers Ice Cream During Their Working Lunch Breaks
6
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Restaurant Ceiling Falls in Love With This Reptile
72
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All Cats Love to Play Drums
51
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Jennifer Lawrence Quietly Dating New York Thunderstorm
4
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I Heard You Like Extra Sausage, Baby Goat
27
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Activists Channel Martin Luther King With New Branded Perfume
28
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Memorial Day: Trump Claims Fallen Veterans Would Be Your Ideal Partner in Bed?
8
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This Is How White Supremacy in the Bathroom Comes Naturally
89
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CNN's Porn Lawyer: Are His Briefs Legal? Yes. Yes, They're Lesbians
5
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Trump's NASA Chief: I Fully Believe and Know the Resident Goats of Sunflower Farm Creamery
115
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This Meatloaf Will Make You Shoot Starbucks Out Your Glutes