emilezoloft

Saved Headlines
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Update Your Planners: Human Extinction Now Delayed Until February
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Baby Dies at 97
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Scientists Prepare to Die
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8-Year-Old Dies 3 Times, Then Wakes Up Furious, Tweets 11 Times Back-To-Back
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George R.R. Martin Shoots Down Multiple Missiles With Classified Laser Weapon
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Thousands More Older People Dying From Injuries Caused by God
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In Spherical Geometry, a Triangle Can Have a Gun
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Ask the Experts: Do the Cats in Cats Say "Cats"?
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New York City in America, New Report Says
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Dog Is a White Supremacist
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S.O.S. I Need to Die
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Suck a Gay Son of God
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Horse Dies at 35 in Electric Scooter Collision
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All the Human Poop in Antarctica Vanishes
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Crossing the Atlantic in a Toaster
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May Fourth, the Day the Dinosaurs Died
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Men Notice Woman Eating Alone, Invite Her to Funeral: A "Gut Punch"
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Pope Mobile to Run for President?
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God Made Me a Flour Tortilla Truther
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Trump News – Live: President Claims to Be Bird Crap
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Watch King Gizzard & the Squad Own "27 Million Black African Slaves"
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Texas Woman Banned From Instagram Fights
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Lions Do Not MOVE!
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Crunk Critters: I Ain't Going Back to Mister Rogers Neighborhood
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Mini-Golf and the KKK
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Rub-A-Dub Dub, Pug in a Kayak
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Why Captain America Pulled Off Daring $20 Million Jewel Heist
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Women Are Better Than Recent Sonic Games
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"Glow" Finally Gives Its Characters Space to Grapple With the Scented Taste of Each Others Inner Thighs
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Little Jenny From "Forrest Gump" Is 34 Now and Unrecognizably Hunky
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The Real Reason Why Kylie Jenner & Sofia Richie Posing Topless on Vacation After Calling for "Exterminating Latinos"
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No, Zombie Snakes Are Not Pleased
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Is America Running Out of Whatever
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Republicans, Planning Impeachment Defense, Argue Trump Did NOT Kill Himself
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These Common Houseplants Could Kill Workplace Productivity on Monday
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Trump Threatens to Walk Then Run With a Whirling Sword
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United Airlines Is Canceling 45 Flights a Day Due to Old Blackface Sketch
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TIME Lords Are a Loving Nation
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The 8-Hour Sleep Myth: How I Created Such Chaos
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This Puppy's Guilty Face Trapped in Toy Skull