Real Headline from Jezebel Jezebel
“Confirmed: Weird Al is a Civil War-Era Vampire”
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Smashes of This Headline

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Confirmed: Weird Al Is a Zonkey
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Confirmed: Weird Al Yankovic Looks Like a Tragedy to Me
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Birth of a Civil War-Era Vampire Diaries
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Confirmed: Weird Al Is a Role in "Star Wars 7" Could Arrive This Year
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"Weird Al" Is a Scam
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Lego Robot With Mind of a Civil War-Era Vampire
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Weird Al Is a Gift From God and Now His Career Is Over and This Is What You Wanna Do I Can't Stop and Frisk
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Confirmed: Weird Al Yankovic Looks Like a Woman Named "Beautiful" Ate Nothing but Advertising Shills
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Confirmed: Weird Al Is a Dream Girl, Discovers What a Conspiracy Theorist Thinks