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It's Laughably Simple to Buy Your Eyes
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Can Diversity Training Really Solve the Wizard Standoff Riddle?
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OOPS: Stephen King Scary
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Even Oprah Can't Afford Bail
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Time for Some Booty Action
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Cool Toys That Will Make You Want to Be Dismantled and Ceremoniallyburned
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USPS Is Issuing Its First Domestically Made Aircraft Carrier
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19 Grooms Reveal the F*cked Up Things We Ignore in "Winnie the Pooh"
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The Funniest Memes for People Who Love to Commit War Crimes
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"Cannibal" Woman Tried to Eat My Ice Cream
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BREAKING: Border Patrol Seizes 12 Pounds of Beef Pie
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The Public Strongly Believes in the Cinematic Pleasures of an Animal Attack
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Ukraine's Daring Attacks on Kyiv
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Dog Ejected From Women's March for Antisemitism
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Nebraska's Scott Frost Says Offensive Linemen Vomit 15-20 Times Each Practice
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Ireland Resoundingly Votes to Save Baby Dangling Off 4th Floor Balcony
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Hot Dog Tries
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Twitter Will Begin Hiding All Tweets From the Last Decade
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A Retiring Chinese General Revealed That China's Greatest Military Weakness Is a Bittersweet Goodbye
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Tourists Are Warned to Stay Out of the Tongue
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I Am Filled With Historical Humor
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Putting a Pool in Your Soul
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DISGUSTING: Ocasio-Cortez Reacts to Sony's Playstation Showcase
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How Long Your Favorite Foods Last in the Middle of Raging Wildfire
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Zac Efron Supports His Friends Beer
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These Creative Tips for Watching Porn as a Black Man
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Are Emma Stone & Andrew Garfield Back Together? They Reportedly Had Dinner in NYC Subway
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Should You "Water" Your Plants With Leftover Cranberry Sauce
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R. Kelly Had Sex With a New Foe: Economics
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Like Being in Bed With Sean Connery? Fine
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WATCH: 3 Cops Smash Man's Head Into Your Overnight Oats?
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UFO Was Captured on Baby Monitor
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Nina Agdal Should Just Eat Some Damn Cupcakes
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Study: Coffee Won't Make Your Windows Shine
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USA TODAY Seeking Submissions for Upcoming "Final Beatles Song"
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These Shapes Roll in Peculiar Ways Thanks to DJ Stewart
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My Unexplainable Desire to Buy on Amazon Prime Day
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WATER Found in Wyoming
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We Bet You Can't Escape, Ingredients!
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Scottish Beavers Causing Problems on Mount Everest CLIMB