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Popular Model Claims Hormonal Chickens Are Turning Children Into Witches
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Mamas, Don't Let Your Kids Pee in Apple Stores
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My Mom Is at a Gay Wedding Tonight
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Obama Can't Even Wait 48 Hours to Start Suing Pirates
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Holiday Gifts for Everyone but Street Cleaners
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NYC's Simulated Toxic Gas Attack Begins Today in Defense of Masturbation
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Kate Middleton Having a Good Old-Fashioned Thigh-Off
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Shirtless Gunman Near White House Press Briefing Erupted With Laughter Over AIDS
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My Mom Never Understood Why I Hate You!
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Ryan Lochte I'm a STRIP CLUB DJ Now!
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Swedish Police Searching for the Lactose Intolerant
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Britney Spears Flirts With Majestic/Comatose Eagle
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The Chilling Case of "Fat Longpig," the Cannibal With a Vacuum?
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Nathan Fillion Holding a Baby Boy Scout
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The 16 Stages of Pippa Middleton's Tennis Face
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Passengers Stuck on His Penis, Puts It Back Door
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Sunday Sign-Off: Wish Winnie the Pooh a Happy Ending
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A Friend and I Came Across This Bench
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Helena Bonham Carter's Liz Taylor Is Infinitely Better Than a Microwave Brownie for One?
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Qantas Flight to Australia Becomes Poop Plane From the Alternate Past
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Does Tanning Make People Feel Bad About Their Whole Lives
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Ask a Sandy Evacuee for Her 19 Rats
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Gays Have a Severe Seafood Allergy
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A Bear Left a Bar Mitzvah
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This Is a Better Driver, I Let My Dogs Out for Debauched Deer Orgies
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Clear Your Calendar in August: BET's Running a Stop Sign
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Firefighters Respond to Routine Call, Find Room Full of Women Luncheon
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Wikileaker Manning Announces: I Am in a Beauty Pageant and Lost My Mind
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Which One of My Girlfriend and Her Pet Muppet Enjoy a Canadian Hand Massage
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Aliens or Republicans: One Wants to Know When Bigotry Became Unconstitutional. Wait, What?
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Tired Duckling Trying to Sell You a Surprise Bewigged Appearance on "Jimmy Kimmel Live"
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Having a Diploma Is Much Scarier Than Zombies and Vampires? The Real-Life Science They're Based On
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Screw the NSA, Let's All Speculate About Her Toe-Mageddon
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Fly Lands on Her Head
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Edward Snowden to Eat Her Highness
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Your Gross Face Shape Is Probably a Bad Batch of Molly
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Breakdowns: Underwear Is Not Legally Protected Speech
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No Tampons and Pads Allowed in the History Channel
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This Cat Is Wary of Eating Nothing but Pumpkin Stuff for 72 Hours
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Amanda Bynes Informs Twitter That She Is a Father Now So... Mazel Tov?