Headline Smasher

I got this when I was tired and took it super literally. I couldn't figure out how a dog could whistle. I could've just assumed it was someone literally whistling for a dog but nooo I had to wonder how a dog could whistle.

It's true!

For once, I can't argue with Fox News

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPhQNGmqLTg

LOVE TORE THEM APART

This is a real headline tho

That's specific!

Honestly, I'm not sure this is funnier than the original story

Who's the fairest one around?

DAVID ICKE WAS RIGHT!

AND THAT EXPLAINS THE SPACE FORCE

What does that mean?

There's a kids' book called K Is for Knifeball

The "WHAT???" is a minor addition, but I still think it's funny.

I'm not sure Nom Nom would be an improvement

BUT WHAT KIND OF TROLLS?

But they were so good together!

It'd be awesome if this had a comma

If AI Weirdness taught me anything, computers are terrible chefs. Unless you're into "Crock Pot Cold Water" or "Beothurtreed Tuna Pie." Whatever that is.

Tasty word salad

That's weirdly specific.

I think you mean "waifu"

Yay!

I can't say this is all that much weirder than the original headline. But whatever.

Draw me like one of your French horns

Eeyore's Birthday Party is an Austin tradition and a body was found fairly close to the event. This isn't any weirder than what actually happened.

GODDAMN IT GEORGE

She grinds them up to make shampoo

EW

Not sure it gets better than that.

Open the door, get on the floor! (Yeah gonna say it's about actual dinosaurs and not a team)

OBVIOUSLY

OK it's a terrible headline but I think it's a pretty tasty word salad. What does it mean?

HOOORAY

THE POOR THING

HOLY GUACAMOLE!

BUT I THOUGHT EVERYONE WANTED THAT

I want this

Fun Fact: Forrest Gump didn't run across the cosmos, but he did go to space in the book (No, really)

I believe they call it being skyclad