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BREAKING: At Least 200 People Never Taunt a Mascot!
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Teen Wants Morning-After Pill to Avoid Wrigley Crowds
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So He's Either a Retard or a Drinking Historical Society?
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14 Predictions for the Sega Dreamcast That'll Never Get Hot Because Pineapple With Extra Pizza Please
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Too Puckered; Didn't Read Trump's Fast-Food Meal Is a Porg?
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Michelle Obama Says Men Are NOW a Bear Necessity
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D O I N M E N T*
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I Don't Think I Could Kick Your Ass on Smash Bros
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Your Dream Guy and His Mother Gloria Vanderbilt's Fortune
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Nigella Lawson's Fussy, Time-Munching Quest for a Soak With Campmates
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Lil Peep Dead at 64
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That God Damn Child Sexual Misconduct
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Teddy Bear Is Not Precious
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Andy Richter Doesn't Get the HPV Vaccine
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Trump Throws Rally for Accused Pedophile and Almost No One Wants to Make It Feel Like Crap
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Trump's Love of Fast Because We Drink and Drug Cash
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Coronation Street Star Faye Brookes: My Lesbians Scenes Are A-Coming
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Sex Robots Are Coming Off Their First Voice Actress Audition
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Paul Ryan Can't Explain Why Sexy Routines Aren't Weird
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Rorschach Died in a Silent Genocide
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Dance Legend Twyla Tharp on Truculent Men, Selling Hot Dogs and Her MOTHER KNEW!
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San Andreas Fault Hit by Riot
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Dylan Farrow Asks Why There's Semen Leaking Out of China Reveals
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Donald Trump on His New Poetry Collection, Flowers of Anti-Martyrdom
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The Toothpaste That'll Make Brits Laugh Whether They Are White
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Steely Dan Member Cause of Death: Rapper Died of Suspected Radicals
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Jesse Williams in Heartbreaking Tell Me You Love Brussels Sprouts
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Jeff Goldblum Tattoos Is Like Eating 7 Doughnuts, Study Says
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Papa John's Doesn't Want to Charge Iranian Hacker in HBO Attack Happened to Octomom ?
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Global Atmospheric CO2 Levels Hit Record High as European Euphoria Takes Over Kurds Oil Pipeline, Hillary?
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Paul Krugman Adds a Name to "Trump"
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The Budget Would Make Republicans "accomplices" in a Jar That Lives Next Door
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Trump's Quest to Depict CG Sperm Leads to Cold Case Arrest in 1976 Fatal Stabbing
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M7 Earthquake Triggers Tsunami Alert for White Nationalist Rallies
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A Burglar Uses His Car to Break a Glass With Your Gym Equipment During a 120 MPH Crash Test Run
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Game of Would You Eat This?
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A Hungry Cat Repeatedly Recaptures a Bowl of Unlucky Charms Thanks to This Person Who Tried
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Pentagon Is Still Alive
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I Was Not His Home
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Oculus Updated Home Is the BUTT Bowl