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Voted Headlines
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Bald Eagles Deployed to Defend World Figure Skating Title
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Medicare for All 150 Original Pokemon
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We're Here to Help You Start Mastubrating
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Siri's Not a "Big Believer in Democracy"
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Kitten Doesn't Understand How a Gearbox Works
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An Amazing Timelapse of a Furry
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China Plans to Kill You
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Burnout: A Modern Lent
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New iPod Touch Expected as Early as 1921
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Death and Other Crime Sentences
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Paul Manafort May Be Currently Using a Fake Nose
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Human Speech Sounds Like Petting a Marshmallow
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Those DAMN KIDS Don't Stop Believe'n
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Just Say No! No I Caaaaaan't!!!
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Cuphead Is Now in ICE Custody
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I Can't Let You Cuddle With Kittens
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Hilarious Livestream Helps Man Walk Again
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Deviled Eggs Are a Reflection of Our Character
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Tourists Urged Not to Ignore Bobby
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Growing Corn Is a Sweet Declaration of Love and Marriage
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Scientists Have Found "A Gift"
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The 90-Year-Old Japanese Scientist Still Dreaming of a Hug
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We Finally Figured Out the Wazoo
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Brand-New Dr. Seuss Book, Horse Museum, Will Be Redacted and Made Public by Mid-April
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How to Avoid Squirrels
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A Rare Bird Attacks and Kills Brain Cells
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Scooby-Doo vs. The Prehistoric Megaladon
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Beer Should Taste Like Nutella
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Gray Wolves to Be the "antidote to Trump"
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How to Do Something
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Texas Teen Bitten by Stray Bullet (And Still Works)
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Chelsea Handler Admits She's Very Sexually Attracted to Magnets
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Warning: Don't Swallow the Rest of Your Boss's Meeting Invitations
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Is Gold Undervalued? Is 1 Oz of Gold Going to Slice Your Neck [Video]
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Stop Calling Asian Women Adorable Puppies
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Why Are There So Many Areas
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I Am the Lemon Desserts
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Grindr Is Owned by a Roadside Bomb
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Her Son Died. And Then Served Tea
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That Email You Didn't Reply To? The Sender Could Be Whacked in a Canoe