Logo

Headline Smasher

Real news remixed into fake news.
Sign Up
Sign In
Explore Smash
Leaderboard Random
Explore Smash
Leaderboard Random
Sign Up
Sign In

After 46 Years, New York City plans to Pet a Turtle

5 votes
Vote
Tweet
Share

discovered by caecilius11
2019-02-08

2019-02-08

Smashed From These Stories

  • Read
    Smashes
    Plans to redirect inner city funds to Tory shires called ‘stitch-up’
    The Guardian The Guardian
  • Read
    Smashes
    How to pet a turtle
    9gag 9gag
  • Read
    Smashes
    After 46 Years, New York State Is Giving Women the Abortion Protections of Roe v. Wade
    Tonic Tonic
  • Read
    Smashes
    Twitter User Plans To Pet 100 Dogs At Dog Show And Documents Each Pet (12 Tweets Out Of 100)
    Cheezburger Cheezburger
  • Read
    Smashes
    City plans to fire officer who ripped baby from mother’s arms By Nolan Hicks
    Free Republic Free Republic

Smash from these news sources


Follow @HeadlineSmasher on Twitter

Get the best smashes all up in your social business.

Built by Wil Gieseler as a weird side project thing.

Follow me on Twitter at @wilgieseler if that's your jam.

Random Smash

Make a Suggestion

Report a Bug

View Source or Contribute on GitHub


Original headlines are copyrighted by their respective owners. This is a parody of news headlines.
© 2025 Wil Gieseler


Sign Up

No personal information required.

Existing users sign in

Why do I need an account? That is stupid and dumb!

You don't need an account to use the generator or browse around, but if you make one you can:

  • Save headlines from the generator
  • Vote on headlines
  • Earn sweet, sweet karma

We tried to do it without accounts for a while, but a few people kept cheating and hacking and being rude.

It's completely free and we don't ask for any personal information so we can't spam you.


I Already Have An Account