Logo

Headline Smasher

Real news remixed into fake news.
Sign Up
Sign In
Explore Smash
Leaderboard Random
Explore Smash
Leaderboard Random
Sign Up
Sign In

Apple's Services Business Is Legal, but You Better Be Nice Even if You Want Your Kids to Set Sail

1 vote
Vote
Tweet
Share

discovered by eeveelutionize
2017-03-13

2017-03-13

Smashed From These Stories

  • Read
    Smashes
    Your business is legal, but you can't use banks. Welcome to the cannabis all-cash nightmare
    Los Angeles Times Los Angeles Times
  • Read
    Smashes
    Apple’s services business is exploding
    Business Insider Business Insider
  • Read
    Smashes
    Your dog knows when you’re being a jerk, so you better be nice
    HelloGiggles HelloGiggles
  • Read
    Smashes
    'World's biggest dhow' to set sail
    CNN CNN
  • Read
    Smashes
    If you want your kids to get cancer as early as possible
    9gag 9gag
  • Read
    Smashes
    That feeling When you are sick and tired of all their $h*ts and still you need to be nice even if you cant take it any longer
    9gag 9gag

Smash from these news sources


Follow @HeadlineSmasher on Twitter

Get the best smashes all up in your social business.

Built by Wil Gieseler as a weird side project thing.

Follow me on Twitter at @wilgieseler if that's your jam.

Random Smash

Make a Suggestion

Report a Bug

View Source or Contribute on GitHub


Original headlines are copyrighted by their respective owners. This is a parody of news headlines.
© 2025 Wil Gieseler


Sign Up

No personal information required.

Existing users sign in

Why do I need an account? That is stupid and dumb!

You don't need an account to use the generator or browse around, but if you make one you can:

  • Save headlines from the generator
  • Vote on headlines
  • Earn sweet, sweet karma

We tried to do it without accounts for a while, but a few people kept cheating and hacking and being rude.

It's completely free and we don't ask for any personal information so we can't spam you.


I Already Have An Account